What are your BAND CONFESSIONS???

There are few things more lulzy than when teenage girls with low-self esteem take music way too seriously. I mean, even on my best day I couldn’t come up with something as amazing as “I was going to kill myself until Yellowcard came on my iPod”! If you think that’s as funny as I do, you will love Band Confessions, which is a Tumblr where girls put hilarious, angsty “confessions” over pictures of bands who make their little hearts go pitter-patter. For example:

I hate all those fake bitches who only like BMTH because of how Oli looks!! I’m a REAL FAN who respects him as an artist!!!

OMG how could be stab Mikey in the back like that!!!

And the body of a 12 year-old girl

You get the idea- I was so excited that I felt like I needed to contribute some of my own band confessions! Here are a couple that I made:

True story. Still love their demos and first album, though.




Via fake sluts who have probably never PITTB and would start crying if you tried


What are your band confessions?? Do u respect Oli Sykes as an artist and a human being??? Is there anything more funny than laughing at teenage girls with low-self esteem express themselves in public forums????

About Sergeant D

I was like yeah ok whatever
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43 Responses to What are your BAND CONFESSIONS???

  1. Mustard Tiger says:

    Bvb dude looks like what you would get if marylin manson fucked a cenobite. Also if yellow card is what saved your life, probably wasnt a life worth saving

  2. The comment is a spy says:


  3. Mike C says:

    The Carpenters saved my life.

  4. Jon90sKids says:

    I know how Yellowcard saved her life (assuming its a her, could be a guy, well refer to them as Sam). Sam was going to jump, then the Yellowcard song came on and they said “Ill jump right after the good bit”.

  5. Grindcore Ted says:

    I would make one of Frankie Thanos Emmure, with the caption “I think he’s a legitimately talented vocalist”.

    Ttly srs. I hate everything they’ve done apart from the first album, but still.

  6. Save Parker says:

    I just want to give those kids reality checks pretty bad. I’ll let life handle it. Here’s one.


  7. King Krakken says:

    Last pic = QFT

  8. Save Parker says:

    Also, who plans to kill themselves by jumping off of something and brings their iPod? Only makes sense if they were playing some really epic about to die music, left it on too long and then Yellowcard came on and ruined the mood.

    • Austin Nutter says:

      Nine Inch Nails popped up on shuffle and right when she was about to jump it switched. Would be funnier if she was listening to some depressing song about suicide and jumped and right before she hit the ground it switched to Yellowcard, completely ruining the moment.

  9. Isaac says:

    I honestly completely forgot about Yellowcard’s existence until just now. Fuck that girl.

  10. hankmccain says:

    I’m still really sad Deuce left HU :(

  11. Martin Regnen says:

    “BrokeNCYDE represent the most important musical development of the past 15-20 years: the loss of the power of all decision-makers and taste-makers, from label management to record store clerks, and the transfer of that power to all music fans and musicians.”

    Now that’s a confession! Or at least something I’d say to ppl who still hate BC13 like it was 2009.

  12. Grindcore Ted says:

    Honestly, angsty fucktarded teenagers who say a band “saved their life” deserve to die

    • Kenzi says:

      I totally agree! If they say any band saved their life, they really weren’t going to kill themselves in the first place.

  13. Kenzi says:

    Yellowcard: “I say they’re a good band but I only know two songs.”

    Oli Sykes: ” ‘Suicide Season’ and ‘Sleep With One Eye Open’ are the only songs where I’m partial to his screaming.”

    Gerard Way/My Chemical Romace: “They’ve really gone downhill, but I still listen to all their old albums.”

    BlackVeilBrides: “I don’t find Andy Sixx that attractive, sorry fellow girls.):”

    Hollywood Undead: “I was listening to ‘Bitches’ as my crush said the band was total shit. I erased them from my iPod and haven’t listened to them since.”

    Millionares: “I only know of them because of Stuff You Will Hate. I think Melissa is ‘Jerseylicious,’ and not in a good way.”

  14. Keka says:

    Avenged Sevenfold: “If this one hot-as-fuck Pakistani chick I used to know wasn’t a huge fan, these guys wouldn’t even be in my iTunes. An iTunes which, for the record, DOES have Linkin Park.”

    This also goes for Pendulum, but replace “Pakistani” with “daddy-issues-ridden, vaguely drugged up”.

  15. Alex_P says:

    Looked briefly at that Tumblr, too painfully adolescent to read. Ugh. Kind of makes me glad I never had any long-term relationships as a teenager.

  16. DarthZedd says:

    I was waiting for this to be a post here. It’s possibly the most rage-inducing blog I’ve ever seen.
    Mainly because of the BVB worship. They’re like the new BMTH..

  17. Anonymous says:

    Black Flag: I jerked off to the end of the song Slip It In one time.

  18. Anonymous says:

    we should make music illegal so these people will start killing themselves again

  19. michelle says:

    bahahahahahahahaha dying “I want to put it in her ass”

  20. Mister Booze says:

    If my computer was hooked up I’d make one that has a picture of Lacuna Coil that says:

    That Christina chick is hot and Italian. Would be cool if the Situation got it with her. Looks DTF.

  21. Wintermute says:

    I can’t


    random band dudes

    when their eyes

    are covered with

    black bars.

  22. dope says:

    wait did this local band just make one for themselves?


  23. Autodidact says:

    Brah, this post inspired me to make my own band confessions blog: honestbandconfessions.tumblr.com

  24. Pingback: *HONEST* band confessions | STUFF YOU WILL HATE



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