When everything about your band’s entire genre can be summed up in three words, it’s a sign that you might be running on fumes creatively. For example, as soon as you tell someone “Oh, they’re a VERB THE NOUN band,” you pretty much know exactly what you will be getting: long hair, skinny jeans with baggy t-shirts, Vans, and interchangeable songs that alternate between screaming, clean vocals, and breakdowns (thanks to my girl Michelle for that term).
With that in mind, you can imagine how excited I got when I saw that there’s actually a band called VERB THE NOUN! Initially I assumed that they were a lulzy parody band whose premise was adopting all the genre’s obvious cliches and exaggerating them to the point of awesomeness (see CRUCIAL YOUTH and NEW YORKMENT).
There are few things more painful and difficult for me to look at than pictures like this– just imagining them awkwardly attempting to “rock out” while their four friends who they guilted in coming watch disinterestedly makes me want to throw myself on a sword in vicarious embarrassment
Then I clicked through and got even more excited– as evidenced by the lulzy photos of them playing in some sad little coffee shop in Harrisburg PA, they were clearly not a joke band. Orange amps? Check. “Zany” songtitles like “Gary Busey Hairline”?? Check. Could it be we have found the absolutely bottom of the barrel of generic, shitty Sumeriancore/Risecore bands?? The holy grail of clueless suburban kids doing 5th generation copies of a style that was generic and uninspired to begin with?? My heart raced at the possibilities!!
Their FB info is a pretty classic example of “clueless local band who will never play to more than 12 people”. I especially like “sprinkled with delightful tangents that lead into strong grooves and break-downs.”
Well I hate to rain on the parade, but it turns out they are just horrible, horrible indie/college rock, like some dreadful band who would play a high school battle of the bands and play a Dinosaur Jr cover. They probably came up with the name when they were working on a freshman English 101 group project and watching Monty Python, and most likely have no idea who Design The Skyline or After The Burial are. Sorry there isn’t a better punchline, but such is life- maybe someone will start a band called SILENCING THE SILENCE that will live up to everything we wanted from Verb The Noun!
I’m fucking starved. Come on man, you don’t got no kinda money for me?
It was only a matter of time.
Of course, ATB are better classified in a related sub-subgenre, Adverb-the-Noun.
i would argue that to be adjective-the-noun rather than adverb
After is an adverb. This is inarguable.
“Must be able to sing on key most of the time”
Lol, what?
So glad we went with a Verb Noun band name, world of difference.
But I have been wanting to start a band with 80% chug breakdowns and 20% autotuned choruses called A City Of From At Skyline Sky. Could probably write all the songs over an afternoon.
the Verb Noun name was a bold choice, because it’s so close to Verbing Name. that makes me think of Breaking Benjamin, Saving Abel and other objectionable “hard rock” bands, so i admire your courage!!
Someone insulted us once by saying we look like Breaking Benjamin. That’s how you know they have no well-thought argument to go to, because I don’t think I know anyone who knows what Breaking Benjamin dress like.
Hopefully Verb Noun will one day become synonymous with not-shitty-band-name choice, before a bunch of bands ruin it.
It’s an absolute crime that a name that good had to be squandered on a sub-Joan Of Arc instrumental college rock band. This is music for the kind of people who want to keep themselves in a perpetual state of butthurt (ala dinosaur emo fans), and while they may be looking for a singer who is “able to get a bit aggressive” now, but they’ll be playing bona fide post-rock soon enough.
Their FB looks like a pretty classic example of a fake page of something that doesn’t actually exist using images, vids, and text lifted from “clueless local band who will never play to more than 12 people” and is probably someone trolling.
the link to their Reverbnation page seems to match everything on their FB– an awful lot of work for a joke that isn’t really even funny, no??
SO FUCKING DISAPPOINTING.
Fuck’em. A name “taken” by a band like this is just as good as not taken. Someone better (or at shitty in a more fun way) should reuse it.
I was in a band in the Harrisburg PA area. Everything there sucks.
Looking forward to when the band starts raging in the comments.
>13 people like this
Holy shit, you weren’t exaggerating about how clueless they are.
OMG
“Artists we also like
sperm swamp, porky vagina, torso fuck, waking the cadaver”
AKA we’re virgins
“Influences
Interpretive Jazz
Childhood Molestation
Michael Winslow
Oprah
Jeffery Dahmer
Charles Manson”
Look guise @ how hardcore & br00t4l we are. Too good to be true.
Actually, I just realized…THIS IS ANOTHER VERB THE NOUN BAND!!!
http://www.facebook.com/pages/Verb-The-Noun/163654943722468
This shit is awesome
fuck any faggot who separates Torsofuck into two words
Fuck. I was totally considering forming a band by that name. Would play scumbag beatdown, though!
The sad thing is that if they were actually a parody band that fb page would be a perfectly constructed parody of a shitty band’s fb page. Instead they are just a shitty band with a hilariously band fb page.
Sometimes a parody is exactly the same as the genuine article and there’s absolutely no way to tell the two apart. That’s just what happens when humanities majors start bands.
^ this
What we as loyal sywh readers need to do is all form a band with the name verb the noun. We can be one band with a large catalogue of generic music that has a chapter (or multiple) in every state. What this would do is completely make out of state touring obsolete since the band would already technically exist in every state. We can all print up sweeeeeet ass shirts with our chapter number on em.
This is quite possibly the greatest thing I’ve ever heard.
are u a wizard?
+9999
SILENCING THE SILENCE
Local 760
SILENCING THE SILENCE 402, BITCH!
I second xALLGLOOMx
I am so disappoint.
Does Foster The People know they are a verb the noun band?
They are shit but you should already know that.
Booo! I wanted this to be “lulzy” so bad.
Hey, you can’t really copyright a band name. Especially not a poor band that can’t afford litigation like these guys. Someone please make the Verb the Noun that we all want.
slam the gorebong = best song title ever! their myspace page is real real good too!
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I made a twitter bot https://twitter.com/VerbTheNounName