Making fun of stupid teenage girls who sweat lame dudes in generic metalcore bands = never not funny, right?? But what about when you run into their male counterparts? Not sure if funny, depressing, enraging or all of the above. For example, this Tumblrbro who is TEH NUMBAR 1 OF MICE & MEN FAN:
COOL STORY BRO TELL IT AGAIN
I wish I could be there for this bro. I know it’s super important at that age what your peers think of you, so I would be very discreet. I’d be like “Hey man, do you have a second? Let me buy you a Diet Coke in the cafeteria,” then we’d sit down at one of the benches. I would be like “Metalcore is awesome, huh?” and he would be all like “OMG I love Risecore so much!!!” Then I would pause for a second and I’d be like “Yeah. But here’s the thing… *cough* You do know those bands are only for teenage girls, right? I mean, they’re cool, I totally get it, but it’s kind of weird that you are like way into them. Maybe start jocking Trapped Under Ice and Terror instead? Or at least settle for The Ghost Inside? I think that would be more appropriate,” and give him a reassuring pat him on the back like his “cool uncle” before leaving him alone to sort out his thoughts.
Bragging about being DOWN W/ AUSTIN SINCE DAY ONE = your dad is reaching for the Homocil
Also seen on his Tumblr: GOOD LUCK WITH YOUR JEALOUSY/BUTTHURT GOALS IN 2012. U mad Austin dissed you to hang out with some jailbait??
Is this kid an actual homosexual, or just super beta?? Did you ever embarrass yourself by fanboying another guy? Why the fuck would any dude ever jizz of Of Mice & Men???? Do we need a new term for Tumblrbros who act like Tumblrsluts?????
Yo, D, help a brother out. Where do you see his responses to these lulzy questions? i just see mostly lame pics.
So he liked a band that was signed before they were even an idea or ever played a show/song and had a demo written by some dudes in another band who broke up later before anyone else? Like a second before they saw the same myspace bulletin? Because they were totally a huge secret and that is something you are capable of bragging about.
Obviously you’re unaware of how to respect a musician for their work as opposed to their fame. Idiot.
What work?
I like under the post where it says “what u do after school when u live in the suburbs and tagged austin carlisle”. For a second I was all “wait, did this dude really tag Austin Carlisle with another dude or are you just saying he wants to”?
wut.
When the 1st Danzig joint (ON CASSETTE!) came out I tore the lil’ fan club coupon out & sent it in w’ a s.a.s.e. or whatever. Never heard back, 23 years later still bitter, fuck that guy…
Fucking Danzig. Now he’s too busy throwing bricks, washing his car and buying cat litter to even care about this.
And don’t you forget it.
danzig suck
Damn this bro has me beat for being an Om&m fan. I’ve been a fan since september 09 when I heard the poker face cover lol.
Soz bro aw no true? Cool.
Winds of Plague hot pantz girl is the current background. No care about anything else.
I actually got the OM&M groupie giving the finger!
Mirin’ his “Seen live” list!
Digging deeper into my blog? Naw.
OMG boys can be sluts 2. Stop being a sex racist!!
a sex racist?? are your fucking retarded? its sexist and its funny as fuck so quit your fucking complaining <— defiler reference.
What they’re saying is that they’re not racist against ppl because of their sex. Mlk had this view
Shut up fuckhead. <— <— guy who needs to point out references reference
Fuck. wtf. once again. people are the worst
omg. you’re. right.
“I liked them before they existed.”
“eh, they’re kind washed up these days– they were better before they were a band.”
Clearly you know everything there is to know.
“Klaiden” – easily identified as australian, so, so shameful.
German name, idiot.
nah defoes australian brah
who wants a shrimp on the barbie? legit.
you can’t go wrong with Terror and TUI……and a diet coke
TUI are terrific.
OH MY GOD SHIT FUCK EW.
I received legitimate DOUCHE CHILLS when I read the “fan before they were” bit. UGH.
One of my favorite parts though was when he defined himself as an Architects sweater.
Great band and I will sweat them til death, problem officer?
Shouldn’t tumblrbros who act like tumblrsluts just be referred to as tumblrsluts? I feel like that term shouldn’t be gender exclusive.
But this guy isn’t really just a tumblrslut, he has the interests of one but the rage-inducing attitude of one of those ‘tr00′ pop-punk guys. So this might actually be a rare example of a tr00 tumblrslut, a one-note tumblr user who is way too serious about liking teenagegirlcore, made more lulzy because he is actually a bro.
Fuck, this site is ruining me.
I’m sad this makes sense to me, and no one i know IRL would have any idea what any of it means.
Im incredibly stoked that there are other people on this planet who overanalyze stupid music for teengers and the culture of online fandom as much as i do (srs). A+++ analysis!
Over looking everything since Terror started keeping the faith lol.
Yeah. No one I know in real life would know what any of this means. Though one guitarist did tell me that “you play like experienced musician but your tastes are a bit teen”, haha.
lol, this right here. my bros have no idea about my vast anthropological knowledge with tumblrbros, tumblrsluts, tr00 pop-punk, etc.
i’m imagining a scenario where my secret comes out, and everyone stares at me with utter disgust.
This. All of it.
The terms tumblrslut and no fun club are burned into my vocabulary.
Your vocabulary sucks more dick than the people who commented.
“I really liked them before they started making music.” is my go to response when anyone asks me if I like a band.
haha thats a good one hahah
AHAHAHAHA good god some of you are pathetic.
>responds to all the comments and then calls everyone else pathetic
lol
*sigh* i hate people sometimes man. this type of person makes me hate on humanity as a whole, even though the majority of people don’t do anything wrong
WE WILL LIVE AND DIE ALONE
high five for the acacia strain reference
~TAS~BEAST~ZOMG~METAL~
Okay then The Acacia Strain way to hate humanity broooo.
The person who made this clearly looked way too deep into the point I was making so you just look fucking stupid right now.
Dude, I’ve been seeing a recent rise in Tumblrslut love for The Ghost Inside, and it really confuses the shit out of me. There are no “sooper dreamy” members of that band, and they don’t have any songs about partying or killing that one bitch who broke their heart. It doesn’t add up. Its just average dudes who sing about typical posi hardcore stuff. I’m not complaining, though. If I can get scene chicks by listening to one of my favorite bands, thats a win-win for me
See them on tour with Attack Attack and Sleeping With Sirens this spring. Should be plenty of confused tumblrsluts for you to choose from.
This tour is gunna be a blast for me. I can hit on all the confused tumblrsluts and then jump on all the confused tumblrboys
Same reason why tumblrsluts dig Parkway Drive lolz. They luv those legit breakdowns
I don’t understand the point you’re trying to push across because you layer on so much useless shit that you don’t need in your vocabulary.
I LIKE MOOZIK 4 MOOZIK
you like Austinator 4 Supreme Overlord of Earth
Tracy Morgan in that homocil skit will never stop being funny
Moustache enthusiast? I sense a future beardo.
Current beardo
Tumblrsquids
I prefer Of Mice & Men back when Austin was a fetus. Being born = instant sell out.
I wish you were a fetus but one of the ones that end up aborted.
hahahahaha holy shit, this kid added me on facebook ages ago, had no idea he was such a punisher!
Doubt it.
This seems to explain where all those new followers were coming from!
Thanks for the notoriety.
It’s a shame that everything you’re saying is just pointless and pathetic however it’s almost as if you’re trying to tell me who I am which is pretty cute I guess.
Anyway thanks for the support! BL that it backfired and that 39 of these responses are written by fucking losers.
“King Kraken” your fish are real brutal man I think I had them on Piczo a few years back before it was fucking gay.
“Casey Knight” supporting Hollywood Undead won’t make their music better sorry but I must know does this relate? http://www.stuffyouwillhate.com/wp-content/uploads/just-like-the-band.png
“Shawn You Will Hate” you seem like a big dude on the internet but something tells me in reality there’s nothing to you all you are is a rat with the internet who’s personality is built on being a cunt because you have no real quality.
“Broseidon blah blah” using the word bro before other words? Is that still cool? Shit. “I’m Scott and this is my blog. I recommend it for fans of the misc, 4chan, weightlifting, and hardcore.” wow I didn’t think 4chan fgts were allowed to run blogs how strange. Weightlifting and hardcore? Are you the guy in the pit that always acts like a tough cunt with their lame as fuck butterfly kicks but as soon as they get a bop on the nose their night ends there? You seem like it.
“Sergeant D” “I like music, dumb stuff, cute animals, and making fun of teenagers.” first thing I see on your blog is a fucking post about Pokemon.. Well done buddy you’ve managed to prove yourself to be the biggest walking contradiction from the lot of you lame ass fuck buckets.
Toodaloo mother fuckers.
Ever heard of a band called destroy the ghost? You should be a butthurt male groupie for them
He’s got the butthurt part nailed down. Lulzy comments indeed.
Its moments like this that make it all worthwhile!
If only ultimate tr00 pop-punk bro would show up. They could fight about if OMAM is real music and whether La Dispute should add chugs or not.
I sent him a link, unfortunately he didn’t take the bait :(
In a perfect world…
At least we got one, and he was very very mad.
LOL at you faggot! Make yourself useful and hand me that wrench will ya?
HURRR I LIKED AUSTIN CARLILE EVEN WHEN HE WAS STILL IN ATTACK ATTACK
Man chill out there Klaiden. Its all just a joke. Fuck Sergeant D makes fun of shit I’m into all the time but its funny so I dont care.
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