I have to hand it to BLOOD ON THE DANCE FLOOR: they were one of the few bands of their kind to remain somewhat relevant after MySpace met its demise in The Sidekick War of 2009. Still, their efforts were admirable but futile, and from what I can tell nobody gives a fuck about BOTDF anymore, not even the most diehard crunkcore laggards who scrounge through the few remaining neon leggings and Nickosaur shirts in the Hot Topic clearance box like zombies picking the flesh off a long-dead corps.
Apparently there are still jailbait who dress like Pokemon villians in Australia, though, and they love BOTDF. Here is a super cringeworthy video they made for a school assignment in which they talk about their favorite band. Notes:
- :15-:30 where they just say “ALL THE RAGE” over and over
- “You’ve inspired us to become who we are.” Unless they are getting super conceptual on me their personas are “kids who stepped out of a time machine from 2007,” that’s unfortunate.
- 1:37 the super, super awkward “trying to be sexy” moment. I wanted to take a pencil and poke out the memory centers of my brain so I could forget I ever saw that :(
- “I don’t have a Facebook, but I’ve added you on MySpace and Stick.am”
- 3:49 that awkward moment when you are sitting on a railing in your backyard doing a BOTDF vocal cover
- 4:14 even more cringeworthy “sexy” moment, via writhing clumsily on a chain link fence
- 4:35 dat “giving you a sexy look over my shoulder as I walk away in slow motion” part. Also, that this part lasts for like 30 fucking seconds.
Overall, I really didn’t even laugh at this, it just kinda bummed me out that these girls are so far behind the times in terms of lulzy trends in jailbait fandom. I feel like I should start some kind of non-profit to help out underprivileged teens like this– we would fly over their ala Habitat For Humanity and do workshops like “The Cutest Singers In SRSCORE” and “From MySpace Ho to Tumblrslut In 30 Days.” If we can touch the life of even one teen, all our efforts are worth it.