Here’s a little idea for a movie that I came up with a while ago… check it out and let me know what you think!! I originally posted this a long time ago, but I’ve revised it extensively and *fingers crossed* am hoping to attract some big name producers this time!
JUSTICE
Movie poster is black with a closeup photo of a shiny badge. The name on it reads JUSTICE, and you can make out a uniformed cop’s reflection on it.
The main character is BRETT JUSTICE, a rookie cop from the wrong side of the tracks. After his older brother and mentor was caught in the crossfire of a firefight between rival gangs fighting over drug turf, he joins the police academy and swears to dedicating his life to stopping drug violence in the ghettos of Empire City.
The film opens with a closeup on the badge, just like the poster. Camera pulls back to reveal that the badge is pinned to JUSTICE’s chest and he’s putting the cuffs on a notorious drug dealer. He’s tending to a the minor cut he sustained in the bust as reporters arrive, and looks up just in time to see his asshole sergeant posing for the cameras with the drug dealer, answering questions as the cameras flash.
Back at the precinct, JUSTICE grabs the sergeant by the collar and slams him against a wall of lockers. “That was MY collar!” JUSTICE yells. The sergeant pushes JUSTICE away and brushes himself off and sneers “Sorry kiddo, you snooze, you lose,” as he walks away. His captain, an older white guy, walks by and throws JUSTICE a manilla folder and says “Your bust today just walked, the DA bargained it down to community service. Sorry kid, that’s the way things are in this city.”
I love the near-future, dystopian vision of ROBOCOP 3!
JUSTICE looks at the clock and realizes it’s midnight, and his shift is over. Sighing in frustration, he changes into his “civies” (street clothes) and begins the walk home. The streets are wet, glistening and reflecting the garish neon signs and street lights of gritty downtown Empire City. He heads towards the docks, his favorite spot to think things over and sits down on worn park bench, looking out over the piers, when he hears a scream. He sees a struggle at the neighboring dock, and before he knows what’s happening, sees a group of goons shoot a woman in the head and throw her limp, lifeless body into the water. A voice says “OK boys, we’re done. Let’s get out of here.” JUSTICE catches a glimpse of the speaker, who’s been sitting in a limo the whole time, watching the execution. JUSTICE watches as the limo speeds off, trying to absorb everything he just saw.
Realizing that he can’t go to the police with this, given the rampant corruption in the department (as evidenced by the previous events), he pays a visit to a friend of his. The friend is a hacker named CORTEX that JUSTICE knows from high school. “Check it out,” the hacker says, “I invented a camera the size of a pencil eraser that can broadcast over any network TV channel within 15 miles.” JUSTICE says “You’re good, CORTEX. That’s why I came to you. Can you get me surveillance footage of the docks tonight?” “Sure thing,” replies CORTEX, as he types a few cryptic commands into his terminal. In seconds, grainy green and whit e video of the shooting is on the screen. “Run those plates for me,” JUSTICE says. CORTEX types a few more commands and says “Holy crap man… That’s the MAYOR’S limo!” They zoom in on the woman’s face that was killed, digitally enhancing it. The computer scanning through hundreds of photos in seconds until it finds a match for the woman’s photo. CORTEX prints out an 8×10 glossy for JUSTICE. “I gotta find out what’s going on here,” JUSTICE says. “Thanks for your help, I’ll be in touch,” he adds as he runs out of CORTEX’s warehouse.
JUSTICE enters the perps’ hideout, firearm drawnJUSTICE hits the streets, interrogating various thugs and hoodlums. He eventually tracks down two guys that supposedly know something. Initially they refuse to speak to him, but he pulls out a baggie of crack and says “I’d hate to have to bring you guys in for possession. You sure you don’t have anything to say?” The thugs protest, but realize that JUSTICE is too streetwise for them, and eventually tell him that the mayor is the head of a gang of drug dealers that are importing a new drug called JACK from South America and selling it in the projects, trading the lives of the urban poor for profits. The thug pauses and says “But you can’t touch him, man… He’s above the law.” JUSTICE throws the crack down and leaves.
He goes to his captain back the the precinct, who is a trustworthy mentor. He closes the door to the office and tells his captain everything. The captain is unfazed. He waits for JUSTICE to finish, then says “JUSTICE, I know. Everyone knows. But leave this one alone. Its bigger than you, bigger than me… It’s bigger than all of us. Just do your job the best you can and go home to your wife and kids. You can’t save the world by yourself, JUSTICE.” He tells JUSTICE that the DA is cahoots with the mayor and nothing will ever happen to him.
The following day, his wife calls him at work, distraught. The inner city school she teaches at is closing on the orders of the mayor, ostensibly due to budget cuts. It cuts to her as she hangs up the phone, and a construction worker is locking the front doors to the school shut with chains and giant padlocks. He comes home to comfort her, only to find an eviction notice on their front door, citing “housing code violations.” The following day, his captain calls JUSTICE into his office and tells JUSTICE that he has no choice but to fire him due to pressure from hire ups. “I’m sorry JUSTICE. I got a wife and kids to think about here. I don’t want to do this, but I need your badge and gun.”
Back at home, JUSTICE tells his wife that the mayor is going after him because he discovered the drug operation. She tells him that it’s not his job to save the world, finally screaming “This won’t bring your brother back to life, JUSTICE!” She says she’s taking their daughter and going to her mother’s.
I just thought this looked cool… mb I’ll work in more motorcycles into the next draft??JUSTICE checks in at a fleabag motel on the wrong side of the tracks, hitting rock bottom. Cut to a montage of JUSTICE staggering through the rain with a bottle of vodka in his hand. At the end of the montage, the view is blurry and indistinguishable before focusing on a newspaper box. The front page of the newspaper has a picture of the mayor with the headline “MAYOR VOWS TO CRACK DOWN ON DRUGS” with the subhead “JACK epidemic causes rise in gang violence.” JUSTICE flops down on his ratty bed and passes out.
The next day JUSTICE realizes he must act. Cut to a montage of him making phone calls on the motel’s crappy rotary phone. He calls his old friends from the Empire City PD, and the montage becomes a series of images of his tough cop buddies suiting up (ala Commando or Rambo)- putting knives in their boots, zipping up kevlar vests, and smearing strips of black under their eyes. He makes one more phone call, this time to CORTEX again. He says “CORTEX, I need your help on one more thing…” and it cuts to all the cops meeting at the pier in full battle gear.
The cops storm the mayor’s warehouse where he refines the JACK, surprising all the workers as they’re in the midst of the process. People in lab coats and dust masks flee in terror as they shoot the place up before seizing one of the scientists. The scientist says he knows nothing, but that the mayor is up at his mansion planning something big.
The guys invade the mayor’s mansion. Scene of the guys sneaking onto the grounds using only hand signals. The police sniper starts by shooting out the perimeter lights, then the SWAT guys climb up the walls with grappling hooks. They silently climb up behind the mayor’s guards and grab them from behind, snapping their necks. They move onto the mayor’s office, where he’s sitting at his desk waiting for them. A group of guards jumps out on all sides of the cops, holding them at gunpoint. He sneers and says “You can’t touch me JUSTICE, you’re done.” The camera shows JUSTICE furtively pressing a small button on his belt as he says “You’re dirty, mayor, and I’m not gonna let you get away with this.” The mayor retorts “Yeah JUSTICE? What are YOU gonna do about it?” He then launches into a long speech detailing how he has all of EMPIRE CITY in his pocket and can get away with anything he wants. He concludes by saying “Now, you got any last words?” as his thugs’ fingers tighten on their triggers. “Yeah,” says JUSTICE, “say cheese!” The TV on the wall behind the mayor turns on by itself and begins to playback footage of the mayor spilling the beans on his plot. It cuts to a family sitting at home watching a sitcom, and the mayor footage breaks in on the program. At a sports bar, the football game is interrupted by the same footage. The guys in the bar boo loudly for a second, then fall silent as they realize what they’re seeing. The mayor’s thugs realize the jig is up, drop their guns and run away and the mayor’s smug smile fades.
Cut to a newspaper front page with a picture of the mayor and the corrupt DA being led up the courthouse steps in handcuffs with the headline “MAYOR FOUND GUILTY” on it. Then jump to a shot of somone cutting the locks off the schoolhouse doors and dozens of happy kids streaming in as JUSTICE’s wife looks on, smiling proudly. Finally, cut to JUSTICE putting on his uniform. He pins the badge to his chest and the camera zooms in on it, filling the frame with the word JUSTICE.
brb volunteering at an organic farm to help with the plight of the urban poor having their lives taken for profit by the mayor.
You’re a saint!
The first Robocop is the best, hell it’s probably one of the best movies ever made. Case in point: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QdZqKVcI9m8
I think you nailed most of the vital cliches, but here’s a few more to consider
1) Black partner or war buddy
2) Female vice cop that is always dressed for undercover work as a prostitute (may or may not constantly refer to prostitutes she knows as, “one of my girls”)
3) Jason Statham
#3, bingo.
Three thoughts. Firstly, the movie poster and outro description made me think of the outro to Hot Fuzz. Secondly, the fact that you faithfully typed “JUSTICE,” CORTEX,” and “JACK” in all caps made the post that much better. Thirdly, anyone else here down with Asian martial arts movies?
Riki Oh. All day. Every day.
YOU’VE GOT A LOTTA GUTS OSCAR
Haven’t seen that. Looked it up and it sounded cool. Will keep it in mind. What about more traditional Bruce Lee, Jackie Chan-ish movies?
Alternate Final Boss:
As JUSTICE and his assembled avengers infiltrate the lab, shit starts going haywire and combat erupts splitting apart the team. Behind all the mayhem, the JUSTICE friends start getting taken out one by one; silenced head shots, slit throat, piano wire, all of which the camera only shows as a pair of hands and a silhouette. The token Asian kung-fu guy gets out -kung fu’d and the big black guy gets out muscled (so much for that extra calf muscle), so you know shit is real. Finally after the gunfire dies down, only JUSTICE remains to burst into the mayors office. But instead of spilling his guts, Mayor says “I…WE’VE been waiting for you JUSTICE”
Behind him from the shadows, the badass killer who took out team JUSTICE comes into the light and reveals his face- ITS BIG BROTHER JUSTICE, long thought dead!!!
Big Bro Justice explains he faked his death to run this new Drug Empire. Now that plans have come to fruition, Big Bro JUSTICE smokes the mayor -two in the heart one in the head efficient killer style- and demands of younger JUSTICE “JOIN ME OR DIE”
Epice battle ensues, young JUSTICE kills bro melodramatically, ending as previously stated.
ALSO VIABLE!
Shiiiit! I’d illegally download that for sure!
http://static.tumblr.com/aolqjuz/E06lhmnyy/joker-clapping.gif
Well played.
Fucking yes
Once the plot gets thickened out, we need to come up with a badass, gritty-as-fuck soundtrack! A good mixture of regretcore, thugcore, rap and also tension building ambient pieces, that move you to the edge of your seat.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NgWK5-VhDSQ&feature=player_embedded
This song has to be in it somewhere. Maybe during a scene where JUSTICE walks through a ghetto neighborhood (maybe trying to find a muscular black man who can help in the invasion of the lab, but only if JUSTICE “makes it worth his while”) and the gangsters stare at him with disapproving/threatening gazes, while thinking, “Damn nigga, the hell dis cracka doin up here in our hood?”, like in the movie Training Day.
Lol, also reminds me of The Longest Yard where he has to win a game of Bball before the black guys will respect him.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nB6Swf3B76k
THIS SONG for the scene after he gets fired and his wife bails.
He’s smashing back a bottle of vodka and hating life. Hating the unfairness and corruption. The greed. The fact that his life has fallen apart. Drowning his sorrows, possibly smashing the cheap furniture in the fleabag motel, getting angry as fuck and realising that life is not worth anything without his woman and his career.
Reminds me of classic early 90′s Steven Seagal movies. I like the cliches and “homages” written into the srcipt but I think the plot needs some spicing up to fit with the standard of hollywood blockbusters today. It would be cool to see Brett Justice (from here on refered to as BJ), in an act of desperation fashions a weapon from garage parts laying around ( ala zombie survival movies ), kinda gives it that cross genre and sci fi twist. Stuff like chainsaw + shot gun or a hand held drill with a samurai sword attached to the tip , highly impractical but bad ass none the less. Preferably after BJ’s team get ambushed and picked off one by one.
I read only the last paragraph and got the gist of things=good movie
So I’m guessing you are as huge a fan as I of 80s action movies?
People need to use the word cahoots more often.
You kinda tackled this with the bike pic, but there need to be some badass but very impractical motor vehicles in this film + a good amount of angry, fast, high-tension driving, preferably a car chase. Don’t forget the lucrative product placement opps.
Candidate scenes to prominently feature vehicles:
- the firefight in which big bro dies (lowriders, SUVs, exotic sports cars, some shot to pieces)
- JUSTICE drives back to the precinct after the high-profile arrest (He departs angrily from the scene with a burnout, he definitely drives AMERICAN, I’d say a Shelby GT500.)
- JUSTICE hits the streets to gather intel (badass cruising + a variety of brotha-approved cars)
- the makeshift swat team approaches the warehouse (every movie needs a van + cars to fit the buddy cops’ personalities, one of them could show up in his daughters VW for comic relief?
it definitely needs a part where JUSTICE walks into a Hatebreed show to hunt someone, moshes his way through the pit to catch the motherfucker, is recognized by Jasta and hi-fives him while singing along to “smash your enemies”
+1
Makes me think Ace Ventura right thar. I like it.
This is cool.
Me and my brother wrote an action film about a ‘bad robocop’. He made it too. Here’s the link to the trailer:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qfGEfq9tNvM
LOL at the number of dislikes. We nearly sold it but it didn’t come out long enough.
undefeatable = the best cynthia rothrock movie ever.
tl;dr
Can you please rewrite this as a proper treatment or script?
Does this movie take place in modern times or is it the 80s? I think the video clip examples keep making me think you are making an 80s period piece.
It’s a good start, but it needs some work.
“80s period piece”
A++++++ would lol again
Needs more strong female characters
whiteknight alert!!
Only Mark Wahlberg and Jason Statham should be the candidates for the role of JUSTICE. I’m thinking of Willem Defoe as the corrupt mayor. This is like Max Payne meets Deathwish meets The Expendables. All cliches rolled into one. Great!
At the end, there needs to be a scene of BIG BROTHER JUSTICE in ghost form smiling down on his little bro, maybe with a tear of pride. Alternately, his wife needs to put her arm around him and say “He’s proud of you, out there somewhere.” as they both stare off into the sky, and then a star twinkles.
“I hope I made you proud, big bro… wherever you are.”
*fade out*
The first Robocop was possibly one of the greatest movies of its time. Who could ever forget this epic scene?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tjEdLuqK1RQ
-I can totally see this film being made, by the way…But perhaps adding alittle Troma-style gore would make it more appealing to the masses.
Is there a steamy sex scene with saxophone music?
good build! are you looking for a gig as a punch up writer??
maybes…
Starring Zooey Deschanel as the ‘zaney’ secretary who’s spontaneous outlook on life inspires JUSTICE to go on a road trip with her, having fun and discovering who he really is in the process. This makes him realise what is really important in life.
Winner of The Sundance Festival Best Picture 2012.
Only if she literally explodes after saying something cute and zany.
Sounds like a mix between The Substitute and Roadhouse. Not that’s a bad thing!
I’ve got an idea for a movie…..
Jungle Gym: Rumble in the Ball Pit
Han (protagonist) finds himself pinned down in a jungle gym by enemy ninjas. Knowing there is no way to go, he decides to use his surroundings to his advantage. One by one, he fights off hoards of tiny 6 year old ninjas until he has killed them all by punching and kicking their tiny little heads off. Twist of the movie: He later finds out that he was at McDonalds and unknowingly was kicking the heads of little kids going down the slide into the ball pit. Cut to a scene of one of the mothers crying and fade out with the Barney theme song in the background.
Han is played by Jackie Chan, obviously, because he wanted to step outside the “Tuxedo” and do something edgy and contraversial
Cortex made me think of crash bandicoot
If his cop buddies from the Empire City precinct were willing to help him, why weren’t they fired from the police force as well? Were they just lying low and going through the motions of the corrupt police force? Did JUSTICE offer some sort of compensation for their help? Are they just awesome bros?
Valid points. Not sure what plot device would spur them into action, but one of them definitely has to be an old codger a week for retirement whos out for one last hurrah, and of course gets mortally wounded, dying in JUSTICE’s arms causing him to rage out.
Actually…..maybe add the character of an old Detective who was also wise to the mayor’s scheme but got busted down to beat cop. Then, a week from retirement gets killed in that surge of Jack-related violence, and the fact that he was loved and respected spurs them into revenge mode.
Maybe they were all in the academy roughly the same time, and the old detective bro was their mentor, and had, at some point, had a major impact on all their lives.
Maybe OLD BRO who’s about to retire was detective bro’s ex partner?
VyceVictus with so many good comments in this!! I would hire him as executive produer / scriptwriter.
Nah, I’ve just seen way too many generic made-for-cable/Straight to DVD cop action flicks. They practically write themselves.
Would take full credit doe.
You need a 101-proof chase scene, easy way to incorporate motorcycles. Yes, this will be good.
“ugh…. And i was 2 days from retirement… I hope i see my wife up there… Give em hell kid…”….. LMFAO! X-D
u gotta have either the hoff or ahnold or jean claude van damm as the mechanic to pass the torch to justice as he gives the keys to the sick machine gun/fastnfurious/speedmotocycle to justice bro!
Hollywood needs these kinds of movies to bring back the good ol days of kickass violence and clichés and stereotypes n forced female nudity to get the sales back up in this bitch ass economy hehe
You’re good kid. You’re real good. But you still can’t touch the masterpiece that is “the substitute” starring Tom berenger
whyd you make a whole movie about the singer of trapped under ice?
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srs want to bust thugs for hustling JACK now
brb playing narc
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