Many people think I’m joking when I talk about how much I love EMMURE. I have no idea why they would think I’m being sarcastic about liking a retarded, wiggerish moshcore band with songs about sucking dick and Transformers. Well, I guess when I write it out like that, I can see where there are coming from. But just for the record, although they are definitely lulzy, I seriously, non-ironically think Emmure are amazing and one of the best bands of this generation.
They just released a promo for their new album, “SlavE To ThE GamE,” which reminds of all those early 80s movies where someone would get sucked into a videogame and have to fight their way out, you are like “Whoa that was trippy, videogames are sweet but duuuuude it would be hella scary if you had to fight a robot for real!!!” Lulziness of the promo aside, listen to the song when it comes in at :35– it goes hard as FUCK! Sick nu-metal riffs and and ridiculously brutal “bleh”??? I’M IN.
But more importantly, check out their “package deal” for girls: EMMURE LEGGINGS. Mind = blown, penis = throbbing. Brb fapping to this thumbnail (I put my hand over the back of Thanos Reignz’ head so I wouldn’t accidentally look at it when I cum, like when you are watching porn and they surprise you by switching to a rearview doggystyle shot and the last thing you see before your jizz squirts out is the guy’s taint/asshole).
Thanks to reader Aristo for awaring us to this amazing development!!
Emmure and The Acacia Strain are the two bands I appreciate being awared to the most from SYWH. Will deadlift to dat siqq riffage.
first
second
FIRST!!!!!1!
Oh wait
“the last thing you see before your jizz squirts out is the guy’s taint/asshole”
FML, the absolute worst.
That’s called “80′s gay video-editor syndrome”. I think peter North has it in his contract that u MUST have a full minute close-up shot of his face every 3 min per scene.
Best gif evar: http://thechive.files.wordpress.com/2010/11/1288490340824.gif
DAT GIF
would watch until my boner exploded/10
GOD DAMN
WOULD WIFE x7000
someone on the rise records promo team probably reads SYWH
>Rise Records
UGH, YOU DON’T EVEN KNOW WHICH LABEL THAT PUTS OUT MUSIC FOR TEENAGERS THIS IS?
Leading independent record label Victory Records* <3
brb in tears that everyone knows I’m a poseur :(
I really hope that this album is entirely breakdowns and choruses. Emmure is at its best when they dont try to right songs, just mosh parts.
You should try to interview Thanos, I want to find out exactly how much of a reclusive weirdo he is!
interview with thanos = wood reed/10
IDGAF Emmure rule
now you can stare at her Emmure leggings when YOU WANNA SEE HER SUCK HIS SICK!!!
*dick
fuck my butt, typo
Backing that Emmure is the best band ever. No fucks. Decepticon 4 lyfe #cuckoldcore YOU CANT FUCK WITH US
Someone needs to make a “DEFEND NU-METAL” hoodie with a Deception logo in the middle. Would wear the fuck out of it.
wood buy 10,000 and distribute to child soldiers in Africa.
^ hard lol
Had no idea they were coming out with a new album, stoked!
Slave To DA Game!!!!!!!!
Slave to DAT GAME
Slave to dat yoga ass
life motto right there
need emmure uggs and emmure northface colab windbreaker
Dat album cover
Already pre-ordered the hoodie package. Super stoked.
I wonder if the Emmure brand leggings make it easier for you to mosh.
One way to find out!!!!
nah they’re wank pants for virgins.
Is it just me or does that Bleh sound like a Hydralisk?
awesome SC reference! <3
I totally hear it. Inb4 Thanos Reignz making Zergling sounds.
SC or die
I want to know where this was filmed. They still have Arcades?
I hate that the fact that you can only play arcade games “ironically” nowadays in hipster bars where they charge you 10 bucks for drinks and only have shitty “classics” like galaga or mortal kombat II. You know you can put the entire Metal Slug and Capcom/Marvel collections in one cabin right motherfucker??
That said, I love the fact that I can buy this album without any irony and totally laugh and mosh along to the absurd levels of wiggertude, since sarge helped me realize long ago that being an elitist IMN is truly no fun and does not a tight bro make.
Apreeshin da wisdom, D.
Come down to New Zealand bruh, we’re literally like 25 years behind in some things. Strong arcade vibes everywhere.
Also strong wigger vibes, EVERYWHERE
Bro where are you at? The last arcade in Dunedin closed down about 2 years ago, and even then the only people who went there were poor Maori 16 year olds and azns obsessed with DDR/tekken
Go to Disney Quest, all of these problems are solved
I’m just mad cuz the one”real” arcade I know of in my city is packed with stuyvesant freshman azns who mop the floor with me in 30 seconds maining Sentinel/Magneto/Storm and creepy DDR wierdos.
I cant wait to blast this new record on my mp3 player whie I duel wield GunBladeNY.
hmmm…..I really am a Slave To Tha Game. NFG.
dat Chinatown arcade
Logan Hardware – In Chicago, IL http://www.logan-hardware.com/
If u want to go next-level:
http://www.tmsoft.com/article-arcade.htm
Or just d/l MAME game emulator & game rom’s & play on your computer.
Holy crap, I literally live down the street from that! Hopefully Emmure shoot their first video there and I can make a guest mosh appearence…
Superior: the Black Hole – http://explorechicago.org/city/en/things_see_do/attractions/tourism/black_hole_arcade.html
Never actually went there for the arcade – it’s actually a popular venue for underground raves. Go party there sometime.
Non-ironically fucking hyped up from this album. Thanos McReignz can’t lose.
0:35 that nu-metal rip off from fear factory – shock listen to it.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1J64hEp63_I
Lulzy as fuck lyrics but that 808 drop into slammage = FUGG YES.
Emmure is a weed money band, I would be super disappointed if they actually wrote original music.
IDGAF if the riffs are stolen, just slam that nu-metal sickness!
Confused by the “CD or 1 vinyl”, though. Girls who would want Emmure leggings aren’t nerdy enough to want vinyl, are they?
Non-ironically <3 Emmure so stoked for this album
WIN
> Normally wears a large
> Buys all his Emmure gear in 2X
ugh. jizzing to that rearview-doggy will definitely leave you feeling strange for the rest of the day. That said, props to emmure for recognizing their fanbase and milking their wallets (srs)
It’s hilarious when bands like Emmure release vinyls of ther records. Who the hell would want that? Do people who listen to emmure even know what records are?
I think that its just as foolish that vinyl is being made at all; just pandering to audiophiles who want “an authentic listening experience”.
I am seriously considering buying one as a collectible. (I dont own a record player, but who does amirite)
BASS DROPS SOUND BETTER ON RECORD PLAYERS
I think all physical media is just for show now anyway. I think I’m one of half a dozen people I know who still have CDs in their car.
Exactly. Albums are a status symbol for the band these days, and vinyl, colored vinyl etc. is just an extra boost to that. Like fancy rims on your expensive car.
Super stoked. Definitely looking into getting the jersey and shorts package. I’ll face getting made fun of by my tr00 hxc friends. Would also wear at my neo-skramz band’s next show. NFG.
Love Emmure, but not sure if ‘non-ironically’…
does not come in xs. would not be able to properly slut. will not be purchasing.
cross dressers only