OH SHIT
BREAKING NEWS!!!!!!
In what could be the biggest nu metal event of 2012 this side of the new E Town Concrete song, Mushroomhead have announced on their facebook page that there are tentative plans to tour with the defining metal band of our generation, SLIPKNOT!!!!!
So of course people in a nu metal band cannot construct a readable statement, that joke isn’t funny, but from what I gather the message is that if there is a noticeable demand for this tour, the Powers That Be at SLIPKNOT will make it a reality. THIS IS IMPORTANT, THIS MEANS YOU NEED TO JOIN THE MOST RELEVANT AND MEANINGFUL CAUSE OF OUR TIME, OR ALL TIME: THE FILTHY MAGGOT JUMPDAFUCKUP WE CAN IF WE WANT TO FUCK YOU DAD SLIPKNOT/MUSHROOMHEAD TOUR!!!!
You can be a REAL hero by joining up with this group of other enlightened ones. This is our time. The time is now. The future is now. We are the future. We are the youth of the nation. We have the ability. HELP MAKE THIS DREAM TOUR HAPPEN!!!!
I leave you with pure inspiration for the cause, nay, the movement:
U CANT TAKE MY SOUL AWAY FROM ME!!!
HOW DOES IT FEEL TO BE ONE OF THE CHOSEN FEW WHO FULLY FUNDERSTAND THE MAGNITUDE OF THIS SITUATION AND WHAT IT MEANS FOR HUMANITY AS A SPECIES? WHICH ALBUM IS YOUR FAVORITE FROM BOTH BANDS? WHY IS LIVE SLIPKNOT SO MUCH BETTER THAN RECORDED SLIPKNOT? AREN’T YOU GLAD YOU STAYED (SIC) LONG ENOUGH TO FINALLY SEE THIS DAY??????
There are three consecutive posts about metal. What in the name of all that is neon is going on??
I didn’t realize my post would make this happen, I actually wasn’t sure it would actually go up at all, so I apologize for this. It’s kinda weird and kills the SYWH buzz, but I just thought you guys would be the few who understand how important this tour is for all things nu.
No doubt about it, this tour may cause a massive resurgence of teenage angst that will manifest itself in an emo resurgence, which inevitably leads to scene kids. This could be the start of a chain reaction which will lead to a scene revival!
We can only hope
If you’re worried about accidentally bringing in metalfags, don’t be.
This hardly counts as a metal post though. Metalfags hate to jumpdafuckup, and don’t get me started on all the times they’ve refused to bounce wit me.
Given that at least half of the regular readers came from MS or MI I have no idea why anyone even makes a big deal about it!
I seriously lol’d.
“the defining metal band of our generation” <– lol'd IRL
I don’t see how that was a joke?
Srsly. I mean, it’s debatable but that doesn’t make it a joke. Personally, I think that title probably belongs to Korn even though I strangely was never that into them despite liking other nu metal bands that were clearly influenced by them. I think maybe they tried to be too srs and that didn’t appeal to me. The songs about getting diddled were just too awkward.
Can’t say I like either band or that I’m stoked for a nu-metal revival. I feel like I’ve outgrown this, even if I’m 18 and shit. I dunno man, definitely don’t want to be that old dude who hates everything because nobody likes that guy, but I just don’t care for this type of music and prefer stuff like Bombay Bicycle Club (inb4 someone calls me an indiefag) or chill Kanye West raps when I want to chill.
Am I being a stuck-up person for thinking I’m too old for this (but not getting mad at it at all) or just being less “weird” than Sergeant D? Not sure, what a dilemma!
I don’t see how you would be too old for this. I highly doubt this appeals to anyone who wasn’t between 10-18 when these bands were popular and you would be in the youngest part of that group. It’d be like if you were 18 in 1999 and said you were too old for the Motley Crue/Scorpions tour.
Holy shit, you’re 18? OLDFAG ALERT!
Ur def too old 4 this kind of immature silliness!!!
Didn’t mean it that way =( I mean that a lot of people seem to hate on new stuff when they become more “mature.” Kinda like the opposite of “I’m 12 but I really ‘get’ real music” but more like “I hate new stuff, back in my gen, it used to be good!” and from then on out, the path to oldfag has been selected and there’s no going back. Want to avoid that bro!
We’re here to support you all the way bro! <3
Can't afford to lose another good man to stangry foolishness!
(srs)
It’s totally fine if you don’t like Slipknot, bro. Doesn’t mean that you’re an oldfag who hates everything that’s not srs. Just means that you don’t like the music.
Slipknot fans are the definition of ignorant metal fans. Metal Juggalos
this is why we don’t talk about metal. now do you guys see??
It traumatizes my anus when you talk crap about metal fans via me being a metal fan (learned to keep the butthurt to myself though), but when I read people like him… Everything you preach suddenly makes sense. :(
Agreed. I love metal, and also would happily avoid 99% of metal fans at every opportunity because ewwwww.
This makes me sad, as I REALLY want to make fun of metal on this blog but it is apparently impossible to do so without attracting retards. Feelsbadman
ignorant metal fan means metal juggalo??? ive been into metal sence nu metal came on the scean. i was 5 when i discovered metal and ive been a juggalo for 6 years now, im 18 and let me say that metal kids, punk rockers, and juggalos have alot in common so instead of just being a hater why dont u just except ppl for who they are, if u got issues fine but keep em to urself. mushroomhead and slipknot both have members who proclaim themselves as juggalos so when it comes to juggalos maybe u should get the message b4 u talk ur rederic. family and love for one another, sounds like a better world then fuck everything and b BRUTAL at all times. its alot more then ppl make it out to b so b informed b4 u talk shit, peace.
They aren’t sophisticated enough to understand the deep philosophy of bands like Cynic. Philistines, all of them! Keep preaching the word, brother. People will see the light some day.
Everyone is COLONCRUCIFIED!
If Mushroomhead got J Mann back then this would be the best tour of all time.
declaring a 6 month ban on anything metal-related (srs). fuck this.
Does this mean my man rock post has to go on the back burner for 6 months?
Yes, sorry. Metal is banned (srs)
cry more
mirin ur buttsensitivity
DEATH TO REAL METAL (srs)
But IMNs don’t consider this real metal?
STOP FUELING THE FIRE!!!!
Maybe post metal when it’s funny and not when it’s not. That cynic one seemed kind of half baked, now you’re quashing skunk apes dreams b. of it? Something like monsters hunters becoming monsters, tho not in a good “werebeast that can use guns” way.
Lol’d hard at “werebeasts with guns”. I played a dice rpg game like that once.
wat GURPS rules did u liek best pls respond
Lol, honestly have no idea what you’re talking about, I just remember the game I’m refering to had “werewolves in the umbra”. My nerd friends invited me to play cuz im a chill bro, so most sessions involved me getting drunk as fuck and acting out my characters like old 80′s movies heroes a la JUSTICE.
Brb picturing a 230lb black dude vigorously debating the Codex of Warhammer with scrawny white nerds while 3-inch figurines wait for orders from the dice.
lolol, honestly i couldnt calculate damge right half the time, but they never called me out on it since we had too much fun
Me: Gonna a Kung-Fu Joe spin kick this cougarbear in the jaw
DM: niggaplease.jpg
Me *rolls lucky D20s*
DM: ….and the cougarbear’s skull shatters
Also, sharing this annecdote is much more fun than being a butthurt IMN. Thanks guys!
Lololol!
I was going to say “bro, your beta is showing” but you made it sound way less beta than it actually is, despite the fact that it is MAXIMUM STRENGTH vagina repellant.
Motherfucking devil coming down on your street. Gonna kick your fucking ass, gonna stab you in your fucking neck, Joe.
“WHY IS LIVE SLIPKNOT SO MUCH BETTER THAN RECORDED SLIPKNOT?”
SO TRUE
Seen them live twice and it was amazing both times, but I don’t ever bother listening to their recorded stuff.
true
I would pay money just to experience that black hole of Wiggerocity go critical mass when REMBRANDT AS MY RIGHT HAND AND SOLO AS MY PILOT. There would be more camo pattern clothing there than at a military welcome home ceremony.
I lol`d for the article and then died at the humorless comments
awww fuck yea boi!!!! i was one of those nu metal kids jumping da fuck up ten to twelve years ago!!! all we need is korn, deftones, linkin park, staind, mudvayne, and/or limp bizkit playing nostalgic late 90s to early 00s greatest hits n im so down!!!!
next up is the gay emo phase… BUTT(fuck hehe =P) next up after that: get ready kids!!!…. look for your sidekicks n 1st generation game boy IPOD…. remember your myspace password n email….brush up on your html… repair your original broken razr….. look for your nearest hairstylist…. get your furry faggety fur coat mofos cuz its the mofokin neon myspace SCENE years backup in this BEEEYATCH!!!!
THE CYCLE BEGINS AGAIN!!! SOMEBODY GET ME MY DIGI-CAM SO I CAN GET SOME MYSPACE ANGLES N DUCKFACES UP IN MY PRO BITCHES!!! N REMEMBER YOU ONLY GET 4 TO 8 PICS JABRONIS….
I would seriously be the happiest kid alive if this tour happened.
would see this in a heartbeat
also shuddering that i used to non-ironically use words like (sic) and maggot
Holy shit the tags for this post are hysterical.