A few people sent me this shameful, cringeworthy Tumblr post in which some turd in a gay pop-punk band gushes about how awesome CRUCIAL DUDES are (read our previous post on how it sucks they wasted such an awesome band name):
This kid is really longwinded, but lettuce be cereal, only hot slutty girls can get away with rambling this long and this is just some fat kid in a gay band so I’m sure you TL;DRd a couple sentences in. Cliffs:
- Apparently they are rude and hostile to kids who like them and try to give them (admittedly stupid) compliments. Although he claims otherwise, clearly he thinks there is a strong correlation between being an asshole to ‘ppl who don’t get what your band is really about’ and tr00-ness.
- He calls out people who “think Man Overboard and The Wonder Years are the best bands ever,” presumably because they ‘aren’t REAL pop-punk fans.’ Could this be the genesis of the TR00 troo pop-punk movement???
- I didn’t realize these guys were so fat and ugly, but that makes sense and explains their ‘bitter guys trapped in the friendzone’ vibe. Unfortunately for them, they are also unpleasant, offputting dickholes, like those fat girls with excessively high self-esteem and the personality of a hot slut. Tough combo!!
- Bums me out that fggts like these guys are the only people who like Descendents these days… pretty sure they never meant to be the flagbearers for grose, antisocial beardos with low self-esteem but here we are in 2k12 and that’s the deal :(
GOOD LUCK WITH YOUR BEING A MALE GROUPIE TO D-LEVEL POP-PUNK BANDS GOALS IN 2012