As you may recall a little while back, we entertained the idea of Sergeant D’s movie pitch which involved the best/worst of old 80′s and 90′s gritty cop action flicks. The comments of said post revealed quite the appreciation and longing for that genre of film. Well my good friends, I am overwhelmingly pleased to report that gritty overblown cop action drama is alive and kicking. Here’s a look at some recent works of art that you can check out at home or in a theater near you today!
SINNERS AND SAINTS is hard-boiled cop action at its most mediocre, which is to say absolutely fucking perfect. Here’s a quote form IMDB that perfectly encapsulates just how brilliantly generic this film is:
“In the gritty New Orleans underbelly, beleaguered Detective Sean Riley played by Johnny Strong (I couldn’t make this shit up) is trying to cope with the death of his young son and his failed marriage. Facing a probable suspension, Riley is teamed with a young (black) homicide Detective to help solve a series of brutal murders that have plunged the city into a major gang war. “
Genius. You may recognize Johnny Strong as one of the Special Forces soldiers in the film “Black Hawk Down”. Apparently he is legit Alpha as Fuck in real life, having studied several martial arts and obtaining a black belt in Brazilian Jiujitsu, as well as being a self-taught musician who released several albums under real recording companies. His chiseled, gruff, intimidating, yet captivating demeanor make him the perfect “solemn tortured bad-ass” archetype that these movies center on.
Those piercing green eyes hide a deep penetrating pain…..No homo…
Where Sinners and Saints really hits the nail on the head though is when it mixes tired/tried and true 80′s action tropes with some relevant modern touches. Everything from the plot managing to mix the gritty urban setting with shady private military contractors, to the casting of old generic action veterans Tom Beringer and Costas Mandylor alongside the likes of Bas Rutten and Method Man, this movie really does stake its claim among the long line of Cop Action cinema. Check it out on disc or on demand. 3/5 Renegade Cop shootouts!
[youtube http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kM-vzkPnfNM&w=420&h=315]
Gritty Urban Cop: The Movie
Fresh out in theaters this week is SAFE, aka Jason Statham Murders Henchmen Part 23. In all seriousness, the fact that Jason Statham movies are practically a genre unto themselves really speaks to just how relevant he has become among the Action Hero pantheon. Because really, the only thing that truly separated the terribly generic Sly, Arnold, Van Damme and Segal movies from all the other shitty action flicks of their day was the actors themselves. The retarded half-assed story lines were propelled entirely by the charisma of their leading men, which is why I consider macho action heroes every bit as credible and significant as any other srs actor like DeNiro or Bogart (who themselves were typecast into gritty crime flicks for a while in their careers.)
…I mean, just LOOK at that range!
Regarding the plot, Safe is actually a slightly altered remake of a Korean action thriller titled “The Man From Nowhere”. I am aware of this since, as an admitted artsyfilmfggt, I watch a lot of foreign /indie cinema and am often embroiled in pointless IMN-level forum discussions on the “artistic integrity” and the “imperialistic domination” of Hollywood on the global movie industry as they buy the rights to “visionary” foreign films and dumb them down for fat American blockbuster audiences. I’ll say this; I fell asleep during the first twenty minutes of Man From Nowhere, but I was wide awake during every second of gunfire from weapons that didn’t need reloading and every throat punch on an OTW goon delivered by Statham. Just as importantly though, the movie itself is fully aware of the absurdity and impossibility of shootouts in the rich white parts of New York, so it totally has fun with the conventions and even throws in a couple twists and surprises throughout. This is what a matinee action flick is all about. 4/5 Broken Tracheas!
[youtube http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m_6ksxHBklo&w=560&h=315]
I will never ever get tired of seeing Jason Statham on a genocidal rampage. Charley Bronson would be proud.
Speaking of foreign flicks, this last entry is a hot new import from Indonesia, THE RAID: REDEMPTION (note that the generic add on title was forced onto the producers due to publishing matters, making it completely unnecessary yet at the same time indoctrinating it into the league of great American gritty Action Cop Cinema.) At its core, the raid is a bare-bones martial arts flick. A drug kingpin has made an apartment complex his fortress via Nino Brown, and a crack team of SWAT dudes are sent in to take him down. Shit soon hits the fan however, so the brave officers must fight their way out in order to survive. The big draw for this flick is that it showcases the indigenous Indonesian fighting style of Silat, which incorporates lots of counters and joint locks as well as stick and knife techniques. This all translates onto the silver screen as a fantastic symphony of ass kicking.
…Although dick punches are apparently a universal tactic…
Whereas Hong Kong stuff usually separates between hard boiled gun-slinging and Kung-Fu shenanigans, the fact that the characters are literally fighting for their lives with the added element of guns and knives results in some dynamically brutal action. At the same time, this Indonesian film crew wants to make it clear that they are no joke, so the plot takes itself seriously and tries to make logical sense. For example, not until a certain point well within the movie is it clear that this is in fact martial arts film, since the only reason they resort to knives, blunt objects, then their bare-hands is because they run out of bullets. As the story progresses, there are legitimate surprises and revelations that explain why they cant just call for back up or get to tha choppa. Real talk, this aint no bargain bin chop-socky slap boxing ballet, motherfuckers get straight up murdered in this movie. Shit is real. The Raid: Redemption is gangster. 5/5 Sliced Jugulars!
[youtube http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uWlmhMSnVdM&w=560&h=315]
Little Brown Men, BIG DICK COLA
I’m a firm believer in supporting the cinematic arts, so I encourage you all to support these films at the box office, your local media mart, or the streaming service of your choice. If you dig em, don’t be afraid to spread the word, since the combination of ticket sales and word of mouth translates into not just profit, but to the increased possibility of more and better sequels. For example, I just found out that thanks to overall positive feed back, Sinners and Saints 2 is now green-lit for production. As well, The Raid started out as a film fest darling that opened in limited release, but got such a great turnout it went nation wide. Now the producers have green lit both a sequel AND an American remake with a bunch of top flight martial artists, all thanks to viewers like you! Let me know what you think in the comments, and have fun at the movies! Peace.
Can you aware us to more awesome contemporary Gritty Cop Action Flicks? Is Jason Statham the Lee Marvin of the YouTube generation? Have you ever gotten your ass kicked by a 4 foot tall Asian man??
Mirin this post 5/5 giant explosions w/ the bleeding main character casually strolling away looking like a complete badass.
5/5 marriages on the brink of divorce
5/5 partners killed mere weeks before retirement
5/5 unflinching portraits of corruption
5/5 dark pasts haunting a cop trying to stay honest
5/5 plots ripped from today’s headlines
5/5 kidnapped daughters.
5/5 narcs being shot to death by gang members
5/5 corrupt cops getting lynched by an angry minority
5/5 prostitutes with a heart of gold
5/5 incomprehensible Euro/Azn accents
van damme edition (though mostly universal):
5/5 awkward sex scenes
5/5 martial arts skills despite being an ‘average joe’
5/5 defeating the final boss with said skills (esp. a jump kick)
5/5 unnecessary splits
5/5 increasingly bizarre low budget movies as lead actor ages [my favourite is REPLICANT where van damme plays the villain and a retarded clone made by the government to catch the villain (who they teach gymnastics and dress like ernest)]
really loving the fact that michael jai white did something after Spawn
I am deadly fucking serious when I say that MJW is the next great hope of black action heroes ever since Wesley got pinched. Seriously, check out the Undisputed sequel, Blood & Bone, and the new Mortal Kombat web series. That nigga is as legit as they come.
He was on Adam Carolla’s podcast last year, seems like a very cool guy. Wood chill with him and blurt out something embarrassing about mirin his physique/10
So proud of mai homeland =’) Indonesia is finally famous for something other than terrorism, child prostitution or shoe factories
BRB, booking flight 2 jakarta uhhhhhhhmm “for the clove cigarettes”.
Dude I had a really good time in Surabaya. Obviously its kind of a third world dump, but unlike the equally-dumpy parts of rural China, the people are very nice and the food is good. And holy goddamn Indonesian girls are hot!! My penis was in agony.
U rly do have DAT BROWN FEVR! I’m glad you like the food too, most whites will say it’s ‘toohot4me’ or ‘worse than Tijuana toilet water’
I have an s-rank case of brown fever :( I was madly in love with approximately 75% of all female residents in indonesia.
Couldn’t this be solved with the relative ease of mail order brides? I thought 100% of email addresses received an abundance of such offers.
I live in a small city so we don’t get much cool shot coming through, so when there are film festivals I always try and watch the foreign blockbuster action movies that come through, as they tend to be a unique spin on Michael bay style block busters and kick just as much ass without being lame and arty. If you get a chance check out big budget Korean action movies because they fucking rule hard.
Signed,
A douchebag
Yeah, out of all styles of Asian cinema, I like Korean stuff the most because they find a a balance between the repressive melodrama of Chinese movies and the bat-shit insanity of Japanese works, all with a constant sadistic undertone. In every single Korean movie it’s required that a character be experiencing severe mental or physical suffering, even in their fucking romantic comedies! Its why their famous revenge flicks work like no other.
yeah theyve got revenge movies down HARD. i dont like the zaniness of the japanese gore movies and the only chinese big budget one ive seen is red cliff, which was fucking sweet
I love your movie posts #nohomomahnigga
I’m so very fucking keen to watch all of these movies, especially The Raid, which I heard about from a bro a few weeks back but I missed out on it at the cinema :(
Also, so much lol @ cinemafags getting butthurt about American remakes. This is worse than IMN-ing, because if you don’t like a movie, its so so easy to pretend it doesn’t exist and watch something you like. It’s even easier to avoid than music you don’t like. In fact you’d literally have to go out of your way to see said movie.
Internet Cinema Nerds – bringing nerdery to a new low
U forgot about this dude Jonny, SANGA is gonna be badass!
http://youtu.be/mX8-YShNiHM
CLASSIC Australian comedy IMO
These people are easy to troll, via “the remake is better”. And when they get all huffy you say “you wouldnt be mad if I was wrong!”
“The book was so… long! So many words! I just watched the movie instead.”
So many great points in this post, I don’t even know where to start!! In no particular order:
- “Johnny Strong”
- Gritty Urban Cop: The Movie
- “The retarded half-assed story lines were propelled entirely by the charisma of their leading men” This is srs a really smart insight, ashamed that it never occurred to me
Also, I like how its totally acceptable to be into braindead, violent cop movies as long as they’re made by brown or yellow people! Like when hipsters started jocking John Woo movies in the 90s, but wouldn’t touch a Guy Ritchie movie with a 10 foot pole.
would counter that there is about 10 minutes of action in the average Richie film, and the rest is sub-Tarantino cockney rambling.
wood counter that Guy Ritchie is only one example, and it’s scientific fact that the more foreign something is, the more faggots love it
LOL
Does this only apply to americans? Cause I’m malaysian and I pretty much watch a ton of western blockbusters, indie, artsy movies compared to local movies ( japan,korea,hong kong,indonesian,malaysian). I enjoy big budget movies tho they always have top notch production quality which is something i can appreciate when i want to have a good time.
The “fapping over foreign shit” thing primarily only applies to white, American fggts. I’m guessing you are none of the above.
PS- I realized I have a bad case of dat MALAY FEVER, malaysian bishes are amazing!
Some of em have roots from thai and indonesian ancestry tho so I can see where you are coming from Sarge hahaha. You love them brown asian bishes! I’m malaysian chinese myself but damn malay bishes have better booties than most chinese ladies i noe. Wood stab with the fury of a 1000 chinese virgins.
i would still have to say at least richie is way more original than tarantino. But im a eurofag so my opinions arent valid :(
an eurofag, imo
Defend tr00 foreign shit!
Agreed about the first 20 min of Man From Nowhere, the rest is rad though, especially that fight at the end. Statham’s Blitz is also great for a gritty cop on the edge movie.
My main man Sonny Puzikas is in Sinner and Saints. The next level AK reloading technique in the movie trailer is something he teaches. He’s actually a legit dude and former Spetnaz, and can teach you to shoot an AK right good. http://www.facebook.com/SonnyPuzikas.
Method Man needs to stop messing around in movies and put out a new album already.
And I saw Safe this weekend and liked the brutal throat punching. Gunshots actually sounded realistic too. Overall, was satisfied by violence and lack of compassion for bitchmade niggas. He shot everybody, none of that oh-you-tried-to-kill-me-but-imma-let-you-live-even-though-i-coulda-shot-you-just-so-you-can-come-back-and-almost-kill-me-later-on-in-the-movie. That shit pisses me off. Lets be real
for real the raid was one of the best movies i have seen in a long fucking time. too crazy.
ALL of my internets goes to this post and its comments. EVERY SINGLE ONE.
Thanks Bro! The contributions of the SYWH community really makes these posts exponentially more entertaining and informative, and I’m proud to be a part of it.
the comments are easily the best part of SYWH (no WK). I am beyond stoked that they are often as good or better than the posts themselves!
Top-shelf shit up in this post!
Also, since we’re lightly touching on Charlton Bronson, Michael Jai White, and remakes…
How about a Death Wish remake, starring Michael Jai White…
Meet ex-Special Forces operator turned architect Paul Kersey (White). When his wife and daughter are butchered at the hands of local Miami drug dealing lowlifes, Kersey suspects it isn’t just a robbery gone wrong, but an ordered hit by El Capo Maximus… a South American drug kingpin left for dead after a violent raid by lead by Kersey’s unit years prior.
Now Kersey’s putting away the ruler… the only way he’s going to measure his revenge is in the blood…
the only way he’s going to measure his revenge is in the blood
slowclap.gif
Your turn to make a sweet action movie post.
I love these kinds of posts, thanks for doing this one. Going to watch every one of these movies between spring semester and summer school.
Also, I wish there were more movie plots (like Sarge’s post from a while back) and TV show suggestions, like Keenan and Cody’s sick life type shit on SYWH.
I have a zillion tv/movie ideas (such as my ABC Family movies CYBER CYRANO and PERMANENTLY GROUNDED), I’ll definitely post them if there is interest!
Keegan and Cody’s Sick Life is one of my favourite posts ever. Plz do posts on all ur TV and movie ideas (srs) they usually get 100+ comments, give the ppl what they want!!!
K&C is a fucking classic and the post + comments had me in hysterical laughter. Ive sort of got my own version of this, I call them my “business plans”.
re: The Raid. Door frame fatality = the pinnacle of modern cinema. Also the “boss fight” at the end physically exhausted me just from watching it. Was it because it was amazing kick-fighting or because I ate 5 KFC Famous Bowls before entering the theater? Science will never be able to tell us.
I laughed so damn hard @ “5 KFC Famous Bowls” my boss just glared at me
My blood is 13% gravy.
better not be cut with boston market gravy!!!
Little Brown Men, BIG DICK COLA
Have been trying to convince someone to go see THE RAID: REDEMPTION with me for weeks :<
Fuck eveyone. Go by yourself. Negative fucks given.
jizzed in my pants hard when i saw that expendables 2 poster…. van damme n norris are gonna own!!!
great post. should do one entirely on action movies that feature wrestlers (never not good)
Thanks, and thats a solid idea! In fact, that’s actually come up before during my meetings with the Council of Wisdom aka the cool nerds on the SYWH Forum. Lots of great post ideas are cooked up there. If you like this post and this site in general, I recommend checking out the shenanigans there.
i posted a few times in sywh forum the first time it was around before it got overrun by spambots selling dick pills. i’ve brought up this idea a few times here or there. i stumbled upon sarge’s posts back when he was doing MI. its been pretty sweet to watch sywh grow into what it has become. /gay.