The latest update in our ongoing coverage of MELISSA MILLIONAIRE’s weight comes via her mildly lulzy (but mostly boring and slightly annoying) Instagram. On the positive side, my boner is excited about her slutty nails and the presence of leggings and Uggs. I am also a fan of small asses and narrow hips (in b4 whale slayers tell me I’m gay because I ‘like girls who are built like 10 year old boys’), but IDK if I can get down with how her knees look like they’re about to snap under the weight of her hair. Feel like she has the physique of some poor Eastern European who got kidnapped by human traffickers, was stuck in the sunless hold of a cargo ship for 3 months with only Saltines for food and this photo will be shown on CNN as a shocking example of her brave battle with scurvy.
But more importantly, I’m pretty unimpressed by the cheap, generic bathroom interior- not mirin dat build quality :( It looks like the drawers on the left are those dummy ones that don’t actually open because the cheap Jews who build the cookie-cutter OC housing development didn’t want to spend an extra $50 on actual drawers, and those faucets look equally crummy.
Miss u, water balloon Melissa :(
Wood u still stab her guts? Is this the only example of when ‘sharp elbows/10′ is actually justified? Do her stripper nails give you a boner, too?