Srs it makes me hopeful for the future that trolling metalfags is becoming more popular (not at all joking, this is the perfect counterpoint to all the tr00faggotry and 90s worship). Also idk who the band is on the right and I would like to keep it that way.
Br00tal FRIENDZONE SLAM featuring guest appearances by BIG CHOCOLATE, 7 HORNS 7 EYES, GOLIATH and CITY LIGHTS. Debut EP "NOT ALL GUYS ARE JERKS" out now!
Listen to Sergeant D bullshit with people in your favorite bands, talk shit, and laugh at his ghey voice. New show every week or two, don't sleep on it!
Who r the fggts?
Probably Metallica or Black Sabbath.
Metallic Sabbath
Asking Alexandra
Band on the right is Fleshgod Apocalypse. Sry guise…
moar liek fleshrod acockonlips
+1
hay-o!
Fleshlight Apocalypse?
+2
You have the ability, you are good and lovely
Fleshlight Pussylypse?
That’s fucking beautiful, man.
http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/16418931/images/1316991386242.jpg
even tho i am a filth of gay for liking this band, Ima give thumbs up for this nice troll =D
Jesus, I was guessing it was them from the tuxedos and the stupid facepaint. Any metal band that uses classical instruments to appear sophisticated or classy should probably just suiside themselves.
Come to think of it, why do so many metalheads act like they’re into classical music/jazz/poetry (see: Maiden fans) if a band says they’re “liek totally influenced by it”?
I’m still waiting for Sarge to let me know what jazz albums I need to add to my collection.
those fggts actually wear that shit live. it looks retarted and im sure its hot as balls
No they don’t, it’s just the costumes and makeup they wore for their last video.
<3 u fleshgod.
yea huh they do so wear dem. i saw dem play and it was xtra fggt
They defo didn’t used to anyway, if you’ve seen them since then you are probably right.
Xtra faggot perhaps, but dem blast beats
whats a blast beat is that like a cumshot but for gaylords
I get the weird feeling metal people don’t get that “blast beat” sounds like vigorous masturbation
It sounds like the climax to a gay gang rape scene (srs)
No it doesn’t.
yeh got meh :(
C’mmon ladies, if you want to talk about make-up, go pick up a Cosmopolitan Mag and leave us bros alone.
Fleshgod Apocalypse is fuckin’ Italian. Do you really expect southern Europeans to know how to metal?
^^^^
This. Fucking this.
No joke band on the right is better than your favorite band. Not directed at anybody in particular.
i respect yr decision to be an homosex
Agreed. Fleshgod is a giant braingasm of brutal technical death metal and beautiful orchestral music. AA is LOLBREAKDOWNS. Nothing wrong with breakdowns, but fuck genericcore. Seriously.
God damn, your description is so tasty, I want all of that nerdy wanky orchestral tech death, in and around my mouth <3
dying so hard so amazing. johnny have my baby pls (semi-homo)
Orchestral tech death, the soundtrack of virginity!
Wow, you sound like you know so much about good music. Please, keep telling us more, maybe you’ll convince everyone to change their minds. You have the ability, Samantha. Please respond.
Left band = good but all their songs sound the same.
Right band = good but all their songs sound the same.
^ this guy
goddamn im growing a 6-pack dying over here!!!
TRUTH
Truth
Metal Posts: the only time in the history of SYWH where make-up and how that one band dresses on concerts is part of the discussion.
Image ain’t a troll at all! (srs)
Love this! is the band on the right on the Abraham Lincoln Vampire Lover soundtrack?
now this guy i like!!!
^^^^you really get whatthis site is all about
Dude my brother and I were talking about good ways to troll metal heads the other week. One good way is to mislabel sub genres in a way that someone who wasn’t a huge nerd but was aware of the existence of these subgenres would do. E.g. Saying stuff like pantera is your favorite death metal band. I think it is important to keep in mind that it is basically shooting fish in a barrel, but it is super fun regardless.
A+ plan, this worked on me once and then I realized how hilariously effective it was so I joined the party.
my girlfriend quasi-intentionally trolled me when she told me she liked some metal but her older brother was into the hard stuff like lamb of god
the best thing is to mix in outdated terms like calling disturbed speed metal
^See Brian Poshein, “mislabeling nerd hobbies”.
Another awesome way to troll metal nerds* is to state that you like a band they don’t like, and then when they get defensive, explain to them in a mild and mature manner that it is merely a reflection of your own personal tastes and has nothing to do with judging them or the music they enjoy listening to. Then step back, and get ready for a BUTTHURT BONANZA!
*Will work on some over-opinionated hardcore nerds as well.
“Cradle of Filth is my favorite black metal band!!! <3"
if u say dat, it is guaranteed that a metalhead will be severely butthurt and go into a raeg and call u a poser fgt
I love when they get butthurt about Cradle cause they are a black metal band. They have the imagery, the music, the lulzy song topics, and the quasi intellectual symphonic parts. They check off every box in the black metal checklist. The only difference is that they have a recording budget instead of sounding like someone played their shit through a teddy ruxpin doll.
Its like when metal fags get butthurt about Lamb of God cause they are popular and not tr00 enough or some shit.
“how dare you actually sound halfway decent!”
CRADLE ACTUALLY IS MY FAVOURITE BLACK METAL BAND ( SRS ) DONT TELL ANYONE THOUGH
“I would give metal music a chance if they only didn’t dress like the homosexuals. Like, the whole thing with BMTH and Manuwar is that one pitches the other catches, right?”
-Link to Monstrosity or generic Death Metal bands whenever a metalhead justifies hating on X genre because “all songs sound the same”-
Enter a thread where IMN’s are making fun of AA! or BMTH for being effiminate and raiding their sisters’ wardrobe. Post pics of Black Metal bands and make fun of IMN’s having long hair. Claim that their arguing about what’s gayer, blowing another dude or getting blown by another dude.
Start a thread enticing IMN’s by claiming a bunch of obscure band T’s are yours. Get their approval. Then, when they begin to trust you, throw in some metalcore merch. When the butthurt comes, say “HA! I knew metal was just a fashion contest full of losers!”
There’s nothing gay about getting your dick sucked.
^^^ esto ^^^
I =P
bro but there aint nothing gay bout long hair, you might think it looks shit but whatever man
Monstrosity really is the perfect trump card to play with DM assholes. “Oh yeah?? Explain THIS!” *press play on ‘Imperial Doom’*
haha, the exact same thing happened to me once. friend was listening to some “death metal”, I looked at his iPod and it was Pantera. 1/10 on the butthurt scale, but I forgive him because he didn’t know any better
Ex girlfriend told me Despised Icon was speed metal.
Stupid whore can’t tell the difference between speed metal and blackened goregrind. Good thing you dumped the worthless bag of AIDS.
Lol’d
giggled in bed
They ARE metal, and they DO play fast, so……
Can’t help but think of some totally cheesy 70′s shit when I hear the term speed metal.
Same here– I immediately think of Megadeth, Metallica, Slayer, etc.
you should see on the metal-archives forums when people argue over whether Megadeth is speed metal with thrash influences or thrash metal with speed influences.
Its a contentious topic, with a lot of passionate rhetoric on both sides. I personally havent heard Megadeath so i stay out of it
I just think of some nerd from Freshman year of high school who was better than me at guitar, and talked pretentiously about how I needed to learn to play “speed metal” over and over.
I’m sorry I only play nu-metal soloz
“Only when we have our musical opinions mocked and torn down, can we truly begin to accept and appreciate the opinions on others”
— Zingo Tzao, The Art of Trolling
This. Trying to explain to my ex girlfriend who was in a sorority, never been to a concert, and didn’t even know “shows” existed why I liked metal made me feel like such a loser I instantly realized my “metal/hardcore/ect only way of life had to end before I came home with a pair of transition lenses and white new balances.
(looks down at shoes)
singletear.gif
Hey! Fleshgod is good and lovely ad they have the ability
No.
lol @ the metalfags getting defensive
WELL THAT’S JUST
LIKE
YOUR OPINION MAN
>Plainly stated as troll
>defend band X anyway
^ this
yeah thats all good and well but don’t be trying to green text on here son
This is only lacking real butthurt from actual metal nerds.
I’ll be the one delivering that, then.
My butt really does kinda hurt over a band like Fleshgod Apocalypse and other bands of their ilk, via the music being over-polished boring techy wankfest bullshit. However, the real raeg factor here is the fact that so many entrylevel IMN’s circle-fap over it, and constantly mention their technical ability as if having all sorts of OTT showboating in the music = good music and songwriting. As someone who genuinely loves old school death metal, this new school of tech death kids just get on my nerves. So yeah, I’m an IMN raeging at my own people to some extent. Feelsbadman.
We still <3 U.
<3 u too brah!!!
That said, I can imagine this must be the worst choice possible for Sgt. D:
Techy IMN shit or crusty IMN shit?
Ur like one of those preacher guys who is obv a fggt, but runs a ‘pray the ghey away’ camps. Sad 4 u
Being IMN is a CHOICE! It can be CURED! Just read our testimonials!
brb recording a SYWH-inspired “it gets better” vid for IMNs.
#notliketheotherIMNs
I’m sorry I’m under the closet IMN =/
Ugh, just look at the amount of eyeliner on those fggts
^ right? I was in a ghey hardcore band and found myself arguing with normal people why it isn’t metal.
is this not a little too obvious? this is like saying, “hey! I hate ted nugent!” when you hate ted nugent. it doesn’t seem necessary.
way to keep us all divided. keep posting that hate bb
The site is called ‘Stuff You Will Hate’.
I’d expect nothing less.
you really get what this site is about
Dude this the pretty much the same thing as last time and it wasn’t even funny then.
acualy was hilerias
dude not really but whatever man its just your opinion and shit its not like you are somebody important like Osama or something
leav the prasident out of this
AA+ Paladin level comment.
My favorite thing about metal oldfags is how they hate on new thrash because it sounds like the 80s thrash they worship.
This, backed, thrash resurgence is cool, ect.
Alls I know is that if u mix both bands together 4 homosex, give the singer aids & add a tone-deaf quadroon u got Christian Death, and I could listen to that ALL DAY!
quadroon and octaroon = never not funny
ps- was the singer for christian death really a quadroon?!
I was referring to the OTHER fggt, Valor, who according to my precise pseudo-scientific calculations is at least 1/4 just because he has kinky hair. Sadly he doesn’t have the virus.
http://i.ytimg.com/vi/q2FDxVHQIc4/0.jpg
I saw the Valor version (via not being over the age of 32) of Christian Death in Florida, and it was possibly the single most embarrassing show I’ve ever attended. To keep it brief, the sexy fire dancer ladies had to leave the stage because there wasn’t enough room, the drummer was rocking a mohawk with one of those skull bandanas that makes it look like you have a skeletal jaw, and the circus music samples kept clipping out.
Oh dear :(
Please writhe in embarrassed agony while watching this.
http://youtu.be/q2FDxVHQIc4
Unnnngh…that awkward moment when you can’t decide whether or not you want to be Morrissey or Steven Tyler.
i was so ashamed my taint clenched up a bit (srs)
so many comments, posts about metal really attract the filth of nerd and butthurt
prayin4u
I think somebody should make one of those “REAL METAL VS FAKE METAL” videos claiming that BMTH etc. is real metal and post it on Youtube.
Average Youtube commenter butthurtness
+
Natural IMN butthurtness
=
Anal annihilation
Sounds like “FINISH HIM” move off mortal combat.
I enjoy hivvy mitilz & even used to be a devout radical (until I stopped being ghey and shit and listened to whatever the hell I wanted to) but I fucking LOVE when metal fagtivists get all ragey about shit. So easy to troll and they have no clue, it’s the best. Seriously, anti-metal trolls, keep it up!!
this whole post makes me lol vigorously