Over the past year or so, I’ve developed a strong preference for kyut, sweet girls (TAY SWIFT I’m looking at you) and an equally strong aversion to self-centered, slutty-looking girls who crave male attention. That said, sometimes my penis has a mind of its own– for example, that I have fallen madly in heart with ALLISON GREEN (who you may know as the less-popular sister from MILLIONAIRES) despite the fact that she looks like a second-shift stripper from Van Nuys aka the opposite of sweet aka the opposite of the kind of girl I normally fall in heart with. But my penis has spoken, and who am I to disagree??
In this post, I will share the best of her slutty Instagram photos so you can see why I love her so much. Put down a tarp before reading any further, you’re gonna need it!
Two things I normally hate on girls are hats and fake glasses. Yet on this enchanting creature I could not love them more ♥ Dat face omggggggggggg 11/10
“Ugh I’ll clean up my room in a minute mom, I’m busy taking selfies!!”
The part where her bikini bottom is so small that it’s like digging into her hip = call 911 and tell them I may be dying of boner overdose
What the shit is up with Melissa’s zombie leg please respond
This is one of those pictures that makes me slightly resentful because I feel like it just isn’t fair that a girl this hot exists :/
That “hungover bro ho still wearing makeup from when she passed out last night” look hngggggggggggg (srs)
sup bb rly into how u have the same hair as one of my favorite ‘adult entertainers’ Christine Alexis
Wood choke back my hatred for dinosaur metal and tell her her shirt was ‘soooo awesome’/10
And least but certainly not least. DAT A$$ #culo