How long until the following poser bands become tr00??

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As regular readers of SYWH know, and as the above example illustrates painfully well, it is inescapable part of scene-life that seemingly all bands who were seen as ‘gay shit for homos/posers/scene kids’ at some point turn the corner and become not just accepted as tr00/real music but worshipped by the same aspie nerds who once hated them. I mean, who would have ever thought in 2009 we’d see the day when some IMN virgin would be calling me a poser for NOT being into BORN OF OSIRIS and AUGUST BURNS RED?!

That said, the tr00 transformation timeline is different for every band. For some it happens overnight (SUISIDE SILENCE), for others can take over a decade (WINDS OF PLAGUE). In this post, let’s try to guess how much longer the following bands will remain hated before they inevitably end up being embraced:

AVENGED SEVENFOLD

My guess: 2018. This band is what Real Music dorks/IMNs have always said they wanted: a no-bullshit, straight up metal band who can play their asses off. Also, they have a small amount of hardcore cred (BFFs with James from 18V and played some shows at the Showcase et al with those bands). The problem is that they are insanely popular (17 million fb likes; appeared in Call Of Duty, etc) and well, losers hate winners. Will have to wait until their popularity dies down a bit before their inferiority complex lets them like this band.

TDWP

My guess: 2016. Musically, they pretty much already sound like boring “brooding metalcore” that could come out on Deathwish (aside from the cleans which they’ll probably drop soon). They look like schizophrenic vagrants, so any “pretty boy” accusations are toothless. And nobody really gives a shit about the band anymore (675k views on this video in 6 months? Ouch), so it should be OK to like them relatively soon.

ALL TIME LOW

My guess: 2020. It’s gonna take a while for this one to happen. The band is huge, their fanbase is still 90% jailbait, and they show no signs of putting out an album that “showcases their love for Americana” or whatever. I know it seems impossible to think that ATL could ever be beloved by the likes of the Absolute Punk-neckbeard-pop punk police, but consider how much those same losers love BLINK-182, who were legit tween hearthrobs just 15 years ago. Or the fact that those kids worship fucking YELLOWCARD of all bands. It will happen, trust me. It always does.

FIVE FINGER DEATH PUNCH

My guess: 2015. Hard rock is obviously the flavor of the month, and while FFDP can be pretty cringey, they’ve also got some great #hardrock jams that make you wanna burn your GED and be like “fuck you, dad!!!!” Like SLIPKNOT before them, they’re a point of entry into the world of ‘aggressive music’ for the kids who are coming into it from the loserish-white-trash-kid-from-a-broken-family side of things (aka kids who for some unexplained reason were raised by their grandparents), and I’ve already heard some of the more advanced deathcore/metalcore kids admit to liking this band. I predict that they’ll approach SLIPKNOT levels of jockage by the end of the decade.

PIERCE THE VEIL

My guess: 2017. Although PTV gets a lot of attention from jailbait, the fact is that their music itself is actually kind of weird and a bit on the progressive side. On purely musical grounds, the same losers who fawn over overrated pretentious bunk like REFUSED and THE MARS VOLTA should be into this band, but they’re not allowed to at this point due to the ‘jb factor.’ Just need to give it a couple years until the memories of their little sisters’ Vic Fuentes posters fade away.

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About Sergeant D

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98 Responses to How long until the following poser bands become tr00??

  1. Dave says:

    so any “pretty boy” accusations are toothless

    tybsarge

  2. Sgt. D who?

    Uppercut’s posts r so much betterer, no one cares about trending music predictions & observations on popular-culture, we only want 2 read exhaustive articles aboot 3rd-tier 90′s Canadian skate-punk bands.

    A7x have a lot of diehard fans (who have followed them through their many iterations), many of which have the dubious-distinction of tattooing the bands logo on their bodies.

  3. uppercut613 says:

    vic fuentes is 31 but his youthful good looks make it hard for the fangirling to stop, time will catch up to him sooner or later though. musically they def have the ingredients to become tr00.

    dead @ alex gaskarth having nicer eyebrows than 70% of girls

    also, shoutouts to this post-jailbait ATL fan for helping start the “ATL is tr00″ movement http://www.hostpic.org/images/1406061046310108.jpg

    • wlfblnkt says:

      Had no idea that dude is basically my age… he looks like a kid. Here’s to hoping I can become a scenegirls wet dream too.

      Step 1, swoopy hair!

  4. Nightshift says:

    FFDP singer has to be 4’4″ tops

    • cougar party says:

      He looks like one of those rapey old dudes that would show up to high school parties. No one liked him, but he always had lots of weed and would buy you beer so everyone just tolerated him and made sure they didn’t leave their gf alone with him.

      I really can’t imagine FFDP becoming acceptable soon, but stranger things have happened.

      I’ve always been a fan A7X, even in my IMN days (long gone thankfully). Wasn’t really happy with their new 90s rock album though :/

      • carly says:

        same about the a7x album, and not because it was “mainstream” or whatever. just kind of lacked inspiration, imo. pretty forgettable stuff…i’ve listened to the album a couple times now and couldn’t name a single song off it :/

        • cougar party says:

          I think it charted and has sold better than their previous releases so the generally speaking it seems to be working for them, but yeah I find it pretty forgettable.

          The song ‘Hail to the King’ is cool. The rest are just ok or meh.

  5. this guy has the comments says:

    “loserish-white-trash-kid-from-a-broken-family side of things (aka kids who for some unexplained reason were raised by their grandparents)”

    lol’d, and then feel’d.

  6. strongerthanalljohn says:

    This is way too true. My friends metalhead dad even went as far as to stretch his ears and take pics with abr at the warped tour.

  7. BlazedInTheNorthernSky says:

    I think AX7 could switch any day now. Every IMN I know that grew up in the 00′s jammed City of Evil/Waking the Fallen hard, so it’s just a matter of time till they all just decide to be honest with each other.

  8. Jeff says:

    Just saw FFDP at Rock on the Range a few weeks ago (didnt go to see them of course) and 50% of their fans were straight white trash, and the other 50% looked like the heaviest band they had heard before FFDP was Creed

  9. Save Parker says:

    Avenged Sevenfold could get on the fast track to metal approval (and commercial failure) just by changing their vocal stylings to something people wouldn’t make fun of as “radio rocky”.

    I think All Time Low will get there sooner than you think, absolutepunk weirdos, even the weirdest ones, already have a soft spot for them, they probably get 2/3′s support and 1/3 “lol more liek POP punk” comments now, maybe in two years it will be blasphemous to make fun of thm as they are groundbreaking.

    I for one can’t wait til Pierce the Veil’s “Flair for the Dramatic” is regarded as my generation’s the Shape of Punk to Come. Cause it will be funny in retrospect to see people holding it up as great, and that record has jams.

    • cougar party says:

      Well he used to do generic metalcore screaming until their 3rd album and everyone still called them “hot topic false metal” or whatever at the time.

      Basically if more than 5 chicks that are attractive like your band, IMN will hate them.

  10. hnnng says:

    The problem with this is that bands like PTV just aren’t the right genre to get considered by those people. Refused were still sort of a posthardcore band. Ptv can only become “seminal” to people already listening to a genre somewhere already in the vicinity of scene music. We don’t know if PtV fans will grow up to be into hardcore or anything. It’s hard to see then figuring in future old band jocking

    • Sergeant D says:

      See this is where you are exactly wrong. Blink-182, Yellowcard, MCR, and FOB were all seen as “disposable commercial pop garbage” when they came out, and you can see how people are on their balls now as “seminal pioneers.”

      It happens to ALL bands, my friend. ALL OF THEM.

  11. Anonymous says:

    “City of Evil” is basically a slightly heavier than usual power metal album. I can very easily see A7X being considered tr00 in the near future.

  12. WIZARDSxNEVERxDIE says:

    havent listened to too much (really any) avenged sevenfold before but like damn, that song in this post sounds pretty much exactly like standard IMN power metal a la Iced Earth/Blind Guardian/etc except with way more hooks and catchy parts, really fucking weird that metal nerds hate on them, i dont get it.

    • buttsguy says:

      it’s their popularity, they’ve had two consecutive number one albums on the billboard 200, so imns justify their hate by saying “w-well theyre not even real meal, th-they just steal the most known parts of metal and turn it into bubblegum radio crap, i-i’m so much better than them…”

    • Anonymous says:

      Exactly. Metalheads only hate them because of their looks and popularity, despite the fact that they constantly shriek about how “IT’S NOT ABOUT THE IMAGE!!!!”…hurrrr

      • Sean says:

        Yeah Metalheads who say that are fucking 9 times out of 10 a fan of at least 2 or 3 Black Metal bands.

        Which we all know Black Metal is “all about the music.”

  13. buttsguy says:

    based avenged sevenfold, easily my favorite band. i just kind of hope people over on metalsucks never accept them, because then i’ll know they’ve sunk to a low they’ll never recover from. that’s the one true sign of a band’s career being over: imns loving them.

    • i-like-lots-of-music says:

      like the metalsucks crowd will ever accept anything other than death metal bands most people have never heard of

  14. anon23 says:

    has anyone else noticed how slipknot were considered poser metal ten years ago but now are seen as a legitimate metal band? give it 2-3 years and every metalcore/deathcore band from 2006-2009 will be seen in the same way.

  15. Titus says:

    Won’t the scene kids become the metal nerds by 2018? Or at least the sort of hardcore kids who hang out with the scene kids? Either way I definitely am expecting yearly updates on whether or not these predictions are right.

  16. postcore says:

    Pierce the Veil are a pretty baffling case in a lot of ways because just a few years back they were the darlings of exclusively posthardcore dorks like me (i got into them because i heard Vic on a song on the Chiodos album nobody listens to lol) and suddenly 2012 rolled around and they were the biggest band in the scene. I guess you could chalk it up to the fact that they’re all really pretty dudes and write the kind of heartfelt lyrics that tweenage girls go bananas for but as far as the actual sound it’s really unconventional by anybody’s standards. Maybe they just struck on a formula that nobody else ever would have and every popular scene band will sound like them 4 years from now.

    • Sergeant D says:

      Just kinda goes to show that when it comes to the jailbait market its really not that important what the music sounds like as long as the guys in the band are cute.

    • yup says:

      Yea, PTV is like the last of a generation of front-man-based post-hardcore bands who were also into a lot of weird progressive shit (i.e. Chiodos, Dance Gavin Dance, Anthony Green stuff). I was never sure why they all did such progressive music though, maybe they were following in the footsteps of At The Drive In/The Mars Volta?

      • postcore says:

        I forget who it was that said this but I remember reading somewhere on this site the theory that nearly every posthardcore band in existence is just trying to be as much like Anthony Green-era Saosin as possible.

  17. wlfblnkt says:

    I assumed bands like AX7 and Five Finger Donkey punch could never achieve tr00 status due to their popularity, but the gatewayband (e.g. Slipknot) is a great counter point. I’ve read & heard so many sentiments like, “Well I listen to real shit like post blackened industrial jazz now, but Slipknot/Tool/LOG/etc get a pass because they were my gateway into Real Metal(tm)”

    I’ve also often speculated IMN-approved-tr00ness has a lot in general to do with age and the perception of “maturity” that gets associated with that figure.

    Less than 20 = silly kid go back to the mall and talking about your poser bands on tumblr/myspace

    Over 20 = Wow you have a blog! such journalism. This must be real music!

    • Sergeant D says:

      I’ve also often speculated IMN-approved-tr00ness has a lot in general to do with age and the perception of “maturity” that gets associated with that figure.

      basically– a lot of it is insecure younger kids posturing and trying to make themselves look cool/mature by having superior patrician taste. “Everybody else my age listens to Katy Perry and ADTR but I think Watain is the best get a life u loosers”

      • eeyore says:

        Since when is ADTR relevant again? Been seeing a ton of regular looking folks repping their shit lately and I feel like I missed something.

        • Sergeant D says:

          since they put out a self-released album 9 months ago that debuted in the billboard top 10 and wouldve been #1 if it was on a label

          • wlfblnkt says:

            I see ADTR a lot like I see 311. Super loyal fans, will continue to be very successful. They might not have a song on the radio, and you might not know when they have a new album out, but they’ll do a big tour almost every year and crush it.

      • Sean says:

        “….I think Watain is the best….”

        I think I died a little on the inside.

  18. john says:

    The other day i was listening to oceano. I was driving around bored and looked them up decided to check out the contagion album. Its pretty decent. I always thought they were gay deathcore shit for kids with hair on their face and bad skin. The black dude does decent gutterals and theyre riffs are heavy as fuck too.

  19. Nightshift says:

    Powerman 5000 box sets

  20. Peter Criss says:

    i always thought of 5fdp as metalcore’s answer to disturbed. AKA the band that found out the secret of taking a popular metal genre (nu metal in disturbed’s case) and condensing it for maximum red state rock stations. you think 5fdp is bad until you hear them in between nickleback and three days grace.

    • john says:

      Ive always thought this too. All that Remains is trying it now. Like 4 years ago 5FDP played here for free Hatebreed. I can honestly say that 5FDP is not half bad after seeing them live

    • Sergeant D says:

      i like nickleback, three days grace and disturbed. and ffdp. no fucks given. they have their cringey moments but they also have some legit bangers.

      • imacommentlol says:

        they know how to write catchy songs (srs)

        love nickelback and was super into three days grace as a teen. There’s a reason these poser scum bands are popular. Hint: it’s because they know what they’re doing.

        • Peter Criss says:

          to be fair, i don’t think I’ve ever been to a strip club and NOT heard nickleback. in those cases i’m like, oh, shit, i can dig it. all three (‘cept three days grace, who just aren’t for me, that’s a personal issue) i can get behind buuuut in the context, you can see why five finger have made such a strong impression….you know?
          to be fair, seeing a band live with a chill audience can be a game changer. went to some country show with the gf and it was one of the most fun shows i’ve ever been to. everyone drinking and relaxing on a beach. maybe if i saw ‘em live it would be different, idk.
          bear with me, the road to recovery from being an imn is hard, sorry bros.

  21. john says:

    These music trends are mind boggling. I cant believe it, I wonder how long itll take for Green Day to be seen as troo. Everybody’s on Nirvana’s nuts right now hard. Growing up I fucking hated Nirvana with a passion. Not gonna lie though the older I get the more it begins to grow on me. Same with almost every other early 90s grunge band. Temple of the Dog is ruling my life right now

    • fuzzyxpickles says:

      green day already have cred. and ive been seeing more and more American Idiot Apologists

      • Sergeant D says:

        yup, this is true. they were a legit DIY punx band in the early 90s (played with neurosis, plutocracy, etc at grose punk rock flophouses), and although at their peak everybody hated them, they are definitely seen as tr00 these days.

      • Chillin' says:

        Can’t speak for the hardcore, super-aspie metal and punk nerds, but basically everyone around my age (early 20′s) consider Green Day to be an influential, top-notch band.

        Also, if u don’t like American Idiot, u r a poser faggot

  22. gotohelix says:

    Will get LOSERS HATE WINNERS tatted at the same spot where u got you’re CRY NOW CRY LATER tat

  23. fuzzyxpickles says:

    agree on ptv. now that u mention prog/weird elements i hear it. ppl who are into chiodos and the fall of troy are into them, thats like a gateway drug for 13 minute songs and Excessive Amounts of Instruments in a Rock Band.

  24. i luv vapeing says:

    all time low is so awesome i hope they get cred tomorrow

  25. PC says:

    I just can’t see 5FDP ever attaining troo status. Too hokey, too dad rawk, basically releasing tough guy anthems or power ballads that I can’t ever see being cool. Avenged Sevenfold I can see. Those guys have the chops to play whatever they want. They chose to play profitable music and there’s nothing wrong with that.

  26. Chillin' says:

    JFC, are Five Finger Death Punch really becoming popular?? I’ll take your word for it Sarge, but that’s a band I never, ever expected to become popular aside from visiting stupid places like Sacramento.

    Surprised PTV haven’t been solidified into the “safe to admit you secretly like” status by now. Remember listening to them and thinking they weren’t too far off from “true” bands I was supposed to like, but I guess when a singer looks that good, it officially makes the music trash. But remember, REAL METAL IS ABOUT THE MUSIC, NOT LOOKS!!

    • Sergeant D says:

      FFDP has 4 million facebook likes and had 3 or 4 albums in the billboard top 10 so yes, they are huge

      • Chillin' says:

        Meant that I can’t believe they are becoming popular among the tr00 crowd! I always knew they were a huge rock band given the frequency they’re played on the radio, it’s just not a band I never dreamed would be seen as legit. Then again, when people are taking Biohazard srsly, I’m dumb for thinking otherwise.

  27. Nightshift says:

    Kevin Federline’s rap project

    Nicolas Cage’s son’s band

    Staind

  28. kb! says:

    shhhhhhhhhhit I skipped over PTV back in the day

    how they aren’t considered tr00 yet beats me, the music is solid as hell

    I don’t see TWDP breaking into tr00 territory, but I knew a few metal guys(not IMN types) admitting to liking the Zombie EP, as it had heavier riffs and was… faster?? idk

  29. Nightshift says:

    In ten years Backtrack and Incendiary will be more revered than AF and CroMags. No one will remember that Hatebreed were actually from CT. Terror will be a 57 year old Scott Vogel and four low-rent cyborgs paid for by numerous merch copyright lawsuits. Ezec will spend most of his time at the friars club. Every band on A389 will be playing dark indie folk, nth gen Joy Division worship or mainlining DBol, benching 400+ and playing Ross Bay Black Metal w/ more breakdowns.

    • Sergeant D says:

      Every band on A389 will be playing dark indie folk, nth gen Joy Division worship

      i can actually see this happening in more like 1-3 years :/

      • Nightshift says:

        WovenHandcore: All that No Gods No Masters inverted cross FUK U DAD! shit gives way to Christian Fundamentalism so xtreem it would make the stoutest of fedora wearing atheists fertilize their size 48 walmart jeans.

      • ultraspatial says:

        well dwid from integrity did release a neofolk album a few years ago. not to mention those sort of tracks from integrity, pale creation, rot in hell (all 3 having released something on a389 at some point) and all the death in june jockage going around, so yeah, strong chance of that happening

        it’s funny tho, carpathian were jocking joy division years ago and nobody gave a fuck

  30. Nils says:

    the ffdp youtube video had 18 million views. How did they get so big? Is the angry white trash crowd so big?

  31. nochance says:

    what are Mars Volta pretending to be?

  32. alanso says:

    The local alcoholic, biker worshiping, ex-drummer, ‘only rocker in the village’ guy from my homeplace (roughly 300 people) has been into A7X for about 5 years now.

    Not sure if that just shows their mass appeal, or is an IMN exception to the rule. Either way, blew my mind when he started talking about them to me like ‘have u heard of these avenged sevenfolds?’ circa the album after City of Evil. I was liek bro do u even unholy confessions

    • cougar party says:

      I’ve noticed in smaller towns, self-proclaimed metalheads will like bands that are not IMN approved, even though they think they are listening to 100% Tr00 music and “don’t like that commercial crap.”

      My theory is it’s because there is no larger scene to establish what’s “real metal” so they simply listen to what they can find and what sounds good to them. Your ‘only rocker in the village’ guy is a perfect example. There’s no larger scene to dictate what is tr00 or not and bands like A7X are probably harder than what 99% of the people he knows listen to.

      I honestly dgaf if some dude thinks listening to Slipknot is edgy in 2014, but it’s pretty weird when you here some guy talking about how he’s into real underground shit like Primer 55 or whatever.

      • Mayonnaise says:

        This describes people from my hometown so well. It’s a day’s drive to the nearest big-ish city and it’s all pantera, slipknot, and ICP all the time

  33. Will says:

    Yeah that PTV song sounded nothing like Refused or Mars Volta, nor did it sound “weird” or “progressive” at all. :/

  34. Will says:

    I’m wondering if shit like LMFAO and 3OH!3 will ever become tr00. Thoughts?

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