UPPERCUT’S FAV OLD SCHOOL POP JAMZ

MUCHDNCE_200

Are you ready to feel nostalgic? Come and embark with me on an exciting adventure through my favorite old school pop jams. Actually, scratch that about feeling nostalgic. My taste in old school pop is super elite so you prob haven’t even heard of most of these artists. But that’s okay because I’m about to introduce you. Get stoked posers.

While other kids on the playground were jocking entry-level Euro dance-pop acts like Aqua and Eiffel 65, I was repping the Vengaboys. I don’t know why they called themselves Vengaboys though when they had 2 bitches on vox. This song reminds me of riding the bus home in grade 5 (that’s the Canadian way of saying “5th grade”).

Ok, I’ll admit Aqua did have a couple of jams, like this one. I mostly only listen to this song for the part at 1:08 when the dude says “wake up now”. That part is so funny. I remember I used to just keep rewinding back to that part when I listened to this song on my walkman. I showed it to my friend at school during lunch time and he laughed so hard that he snorted milk out of his nose onto this kid who was lactose intolerant, then the kid started crying and had to go to the nurse’s office. Lmao.

Here is a very #rare and #based Canadian artist. I used to jock Prozzak so hard. They were the original sad boys, long before Real Friends and Yung Lean. Srsly, their songs are self pity as fuck, they’re named after an SSRI and their singer is a depressed cartoon character with no neck. Keep crying to your Mineral vinyl, posers. This is tr00 authentic 90′s emo.

This song is from the Dawson’s Creek soundtrack so you know it goes hard. I first heard it on the radio in the car with my dad when I was 10. Some girl called in to request a song and she was like “do you know that song from Dawson’s Creek that’s like ‘life’s a bitch and then you die’? Is that a real song?” Lol. Of course it’s a real song. Dumb bitch. The lyric in this song reminded me of the Ricki Lake show and how awesome it was, especially when they had dysfunctional poor people on as guests.

The girl wearing overalls at the beginning of this video just made me so nostalgic for 90′s fashion. I wish I could go back to a time when girls wore overalls. This group had a stripper on vox, so again, I don’t know why they were called the Boomtang Boys. This song is tight though, it’s my fav from them. Actually, my fav from them is either that or this one.

This video is creepy as fuck. All of these girls have mom swag and they’re singing about abducting an adolescent boy from his tree house. “Do you ever get lonely playing with your toys?” Run adolescent boy, run quick. These crazy Irish bitches are after your lucky charms, AKA your dick, son. What’s that pixie dust for? Is that a rape drug? This is pedophilia. Disgusting. 0/10 wood not rewatch.

Long before Jersey Shore, these advanced Canadians were pioneering the guido aesthetic. This song is cool cause it’s about getting head from yo bitch. But then they say they’ll return the favor by going down on them. I didn’t catch all of the sexual innuendos as a kid but now it all makes sense. “Gonna make you cum tonight… over to my house!!” So clever. B44 were the kings of advanced aesthetics and god tier sexual wordplay.

I just realized that most of the songs I’m going to end up posting are Canadian and that’s cause Canada has the most advanced music scene. This song is totally proto-Hollistercore, way ahead of it’s time. Bands like We The Kings and Mayday Parade owe a lot of their success to these guys. One time some dude was like “do you like the band Waves?” and I was like “you mean WAVE?” and he was like “nahh, Waves” then he linked me to this video and I was like “wtf is this inauthentic poser shit”then I told him to listen to some REAL music, like Wave.

This song = some Oprah look alike telling you to believe in yourself. When I listen to it I’m like damn I’m the shit, thanx Canadian Oprah for making me feel good about myself”I’m a super star! So are you! Don’t let anyone tell you otherwise. Reach for the sky! And hold your head up high! The music in this reminds me of the Snowboard Kids soundtrack, one of the best video game soundtracks IMO.

I will finish this post with this bittersweet love ballad. The girl in this is cute. Don’t google what she looks like now though, she got kinda ratchet. LMS if u remember when #1 pop hits were by wholesome Christian pop rock bands with cute 7.5/10 singers and not trashy Australian female rappers who try to sound they’re a minority from a Southern United States ghetto and Nickelodeon starlets with no ass.

Pop-Culture-90s

What are ur favorite old school pop jamz? Was the late 90′s undoubtedly the best era for pop music? Why is Canada’s music scene so advanced?

Posted in 90s hardcore, bands i like, bands who used to be popular, eurodance, euros, eurovision, pop, pop songs I like | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 35 Comments

PIERCE THE VEIL: Most Jocked Band 2023

Can’t tell if important band for a generation or night shift at Best Buy

PIERCE THE VEIL might be one of the most highly regarded scene bands of their time. Not really right now, but they have potential to be the most jocked band of all their peers in about 5-10 years. PTV-core could definitely be a thing, and bands on the future tumblr will be repping their shirts so you know they got cred without even listening to their music. Sounds ridiculous to us right now, but here me out:

HUMbLE BEGINNINGs:

When I went to a lot of shows in high school, this was the PTV song that everyone knew when they opened like every tour.  People could latch on to this song, but the rest was usually a little too weird.  I mean they were on Equal Vision, c’mon, that band was not meant to be super accessible. I loved em, but thought for sure they’d just open tours for a few years and kind of fade away. They blew up somehow when I was in college and I have no idea why, but those years of being kind of known but not really will help them in the long run, as opposed to bands who blew up immediately like Attack Attack. Their success will seem more earned, like they toiled for years to get where they did. Hella inspo. And kids don’t want to jock the obvious biggest most successful bands, they want to jock the underrated ones, and PTV have been overlooked like their whole career.

Music Actually P Weird:

In terms of music, Pierce the Veil are actually kind of progressive. There are some interesting song structure choices here, the guitar work is def above average, and them melodies. They often get lumped in with breakdown-cleanchorus-breakdown scene bands, but are way more complex than that. Always thought they fit in more with like Dance Gavin Dance and stuff, they were just catchier and able to blow up like they never did. This will be highly appealing to kids in the future who won’t want to jock the predictable scene bands, but the ones that make them seem more special. Think of Pierce the Veil like a Fall of Troy of the future, it will be dangerous to insult them, and important to say they’re an influence when you start a weird post-scene band.

CONSISTENCY:

This video has 7 million views, the one with Kellin Quinn has 30 mil.

What’s weird about Pierce the Veil is that they never changed their sound. The songs on their newest album could fit on their first album, they’re just at a higher quality. Scene bands usually go through changes, from trying to get huge huge like Asking Alexandria, to the Devil Wears Prada trying to go full on tr00 metal, to Woe Is Me changing every member and breaking up after like four months. People will jock specific eras of those other bands “just Bone Palace era Chiodos”, “only early fun Four Year Strong”, but Pierce the Veil actually have a consistent catalog that holds up pretty well. They do their own thing so well that its pretty hard to compare them to other bands too. Perfect for kids to tell “poser, ignorant” other kids who’ve never heard of them to just play their discography on Spotify from front to back. Assuming Spotify can maintain a solid revenue model for a decade.

Minor Stuff Fades Away in the Future:

This song pretty good, I get the second and third albums confused a lot, #consistent

What are the reasons people hate on Pierce the Veil now? They’re only successful because of little girls who like the singer, they super image obsessed, and all that scenecore shit isn’t tr00 anyway etc.?

Well in the future, those little girls will be grown women, and super nostalgic over this kind of sound. The singer dude is already like 30 and not as cute as he gets shit on for, that will only go down further with time. And most importantly, scene music will be seminal. People will be jocking this 2000′s stuff like the 90′s now, and Pierce the Veil has all the potential to be a “hugely important” and a “groundbreaking”, “amazing” band for kids of the future, as told by kids born in 2007 who think they were born in the wrong generation until they do a reunion tour and blow their minds. Its happened before and will happen again…

"Ugh, why couldn't i have been around in 2008 to see them play drella live :c meow" - respected musician of 2023

“Ugh, why couldn’t i have been around in 2008 to see them play drella live :c meow” – respected musician of 2023

Posted in 90s hardcore, neon merch, scene, scene music | Tagged , , , , | 27 Comments

CYRIL’S MEMES is the best thing on the internet xD

cyril's memes

As someone who has been on the internet since 1994 or so, it takes a lot to impress me in terms of zany internet content. With that said, I feel confident in saying that CYRIL’S MEMES is the single best thing ever on the internet. His techniques are… so advanced O_o Like, DEPRESSED TEENAGER-level sophisticated.

Cyril’s bread and butter is his pop-punk memes:

wonder year

pp vinyl

pp screamo

bieber u mad

pp lotr

1483310_658325157553492_1141847614_nI love his pop-punk memes but imo his ‘normal memes’ are his best work, approaching Tim Heidecker levels of anti-comedy:

glasses so black

not racist

simson

feb

funy dog

funy face xd

And last but not least, Cyril himself, the man behind the memes:

cyril

Posted in lulzy pictures, what we think about stuff | 25 Comments

THE ORDER OF ELIJAH release mindbottling/cringey lyric video about ‘fake christians’

Let’s discuss The Order of Elijah‘s new lyric video – “God’s Unwanted Children”

KEY POINTS:

  • The Order’s hometown is Joplin, Missouri. Shouts to Christofer Drew!
  • BlankTV and BryanStars BOTH wouldn’t premiere this video?!
  • Their bio boasts that “The band is backed by many sponsors including Dean Markley Strings and SW MO Monster Energy.” Didn’t know Monster had factions now.
  • Single starts promising with Garbage Day-drums and pages of a Slipknot tab book rearranged.
  • The phrases “A Frankenstein of a failed religion” and “Selfie warship” appear before the one minute mark.
  • Emmure is also name-dropped in the same sentence as Eminem before you can comment “F1rst!”
  • That digital breakdown/logo branding part was written by Wayne Static as part of a Kickstarter perk for donating $100 to his latest side project. It has to be.
  • Victory’s current A&R slave will hear those rap parts and say “Neurotic November, who? These guys are the real deal, Tony.”
  • More name drops include Tim Lambesis, Mattie Montgomery and Fronzilla. Could these guys be even more desperate for a RT? Idk, the frontman attention they crave seems really gay for Christcore.

Are lyrics once thought impossible to not crack up while screaming the new “cover a popular song to get attention” trick for bands nobody’s ever heard of?

"Tyler, hurry up with the mixes, this is topical!"

“Tyler, hurry up with the mixes, this is topical!”

Posted in jesus christ | Tagged , , , | 28 Comments

What’s your favorite kind of RISECORE??

Smile kids! You’re on Rise Records now! Can never fail!

Rise Records is probably the most successful scene label ever, and they owe that success to always staying on the cutting edge, developing tons of young promising bands, and knowing what they do well. Over the years the term “Risecore” has existed to describe the type of bands they sign, or the type of bands that desperately want to be signed by them. But Rise has expanded, and made a ton of money, so I think the definition needs some cleaning up, because there are many different kinds of Risecore, all equally Rise-y and worthy of imitation in an effort to get that fat, fat scene money. Let’s take a look.

1. Risecore Classic

Examples: In Fear and Faith, Like Moths To Flames, Memphis May Fire, Miss May I, My Ticket Home, Plot in You, Color Morale, Palisades, DangerKids, Crown the Empire, etc.

This is the Risecore bread and butter, what made them a ton of money and brought them to wear they are today. While there are tons of variations, most notably Crabcore, and some of the Nu-metalcore stuff that is heavy with Risecore today, to keep things simple I will refer to this kind of Risecore with a simple formula:

RiseCore = (Screamed Verses * Sung Choruses) + Breakdowns

Most bands on Rise or who want to be on Rise follow this simple formula to a T, and tho many of them release an album, open a bunch of tours, go nowhere then break up, this is where the profit is made. Rise should be making a shit ton of money this year just from Of mice and Men, Issues, and Memphis May Fire albums, all who fall into this category. While Issues will be the next big band here because of the differentiatingly good clean vocals, Memphis May Fire is the prime example of today’s Risecore. Chango Studios vibe to a high level, and consistency. They are about to release an album that should sound identical to their last one, but sell like five times as much. And with an ugly cover that looks like dicks from a distance? This is what people are probably talking about if they say Risecore. But its more than just this!

2. RiSingCore

Examples: Sleeping With Sirens, Emarosa, Dance Gavin Dance, Hands Like Houses, Alive Like Me

The main difference from Risecore and RiSingCore, is a lack of screaming and breakdowns. That’s pretty much it. The general vibe of a Risecore song is still there, because they only use a handful of producers, but the focus is on the singer. Usually this is more in the post-hardcore vein, with bands like Pm Today and Tides of Man who were signed mainly to tour with like Dance Gavin Dance, but that didn’t really work out as well and they never sold crazy or broke out.

Rise is now perfecting this area with bands like Sleeping With Sirens, who found legitimate commercial success. They started out as Risecore with screaming, but found out you could focus on the cute singer, cut the screams, get poppier, and make boats of money. From looking at their most recent signing Alive Like Me (Sleeping With Sirens clone p much), Rise knows this and will likely push this sector of their artists in that direction and further from the post-hardcore ish, which hasn’t sold too well outside of Dance Gavin Dance, who are essentially an outlier because they are mad weird.

3. RisePopPunk!

Examples: Transit, Man Overboard, Polar Bear Club, Make Do and Mend, A Loss For Words

The way Rise has been investing in young tr00 pop punk bands in the past like two years is some pretty heavy validation that its the future. And they’ve been picking pretty much the cream of the crop for the most hyped, Warped ready young adults ready to take over a dive bar near you. They tried to make Man Overboard mainstream successful like Sleeping With Sirens but I don’t think it ever took, so they might be diversifying their funds in this area. The risk is lower, but so is the potential for huge returns, so they’ll probably find the next trend and focus in that area. Also that newest Transit album was real bad.

4. RiseOldCore

Examples: 7 Seconds, Bouncing Souls, Evergreen Terrace, Dave Hause, Face to Face, Hot Water Music, Poison the Well, etc.

This video has 177k views. This Sleeping W/Sirens video has 27 million.

Since Rise has been making a ton of money, they’ve started signing really really old super dated sounding bands that needed “another chance”. There is really no potential for making a ton of money with these bands, they might break even if lucky, and the general Rise audience hates them, so its mostly a cred grab. The Rise owner probably legitimately likes these bands, but there’s no way to spin these signings as great business decisions. So they exist on the roster as favors, or to tell tr00 punx out there that hey, we don’t just sign super scene bands to make money! We have roots! I dunno, its pretty much a foundation for washed-up punks at this point, and that’s fine and nice, but whatever.

There are a couple outliers, like the Acacia Strain who are too heavy and don’t have sung choruses to be classic Risecore, and the Early November who doesn’t really fit in the tr00 pop punk but aren’t old enough to be Oldcore. So its pretty complicated, but in general, this is what Risecore is today, and who knows, in the future EDMCore may be their biggest money maker, or something. But they’ll still probably try a couple new tr00 Risecore bands to fill out the roster every year.

Sure, let’s give Kevin Seconds a contract

Posted in scene, scene 4 olds, what teens are into | Tagged , , , , , | 64 Comments

BEARTOOTH poses the question: is HARDCRAB “real music”??

However hard Sarge and uppercut are pushing for the long awaited neon-revival scene, the cold hard facts of the matter is that we are still living in the age of tr00ness. Credibility, earnestness and plaid flannels reign supreme. Look at any FB merch swap page and you’ll see that young music fans are still desperately trying to get rid of their Ghost Inside, Stick 2 Ur Guns and Sworn In shirts as if they carried a deadly disease: even srscore isn’t srs enough anymore!!  So while we await the inevitable return of fun and synth/breakdown combos, I can’t help but wonder how bands that don’t neatly fit into either category will be remembered. Enter BEARTOOTH.

professional video with 300,000+ views, sponsored by Red Bull?? NOT PUNK

Beartooth is a HARDCORECORE/HARDCRAB band fronted by Caleb Shomo, the screamer on the last two Attack Attack albums. He entirely self-produced an EP in 2013 that was pretty good, but the band really stepped it up with their new album DISGUSTING, helped in no small part by picking up Kamron and Oshie from CITY LIGHTS to play guitar and bass. This band has only been around for a year or so and they’re already playing huge tours (this year’s Warped included) and poised to be just as big as Of Mice & Men. But the question remains… are they REAL MUSIC??

DIY garage show, complete with meaningful speech and passionate fingerpointing? PVNK AS FUKK

Beartooth are pretty unique considering their frontman comes from unmistakably scene origins, but his new band successfully built DIY hardcore credibility in no time at all. The uplifting, melodic choruses betray Caleb’s crabcore post, but the fact that they dropped the synth and half of their riffs would fit in on a Suburban Scum 7″ complicate things. It’s still a bit too early for the masses to accept jocking Attack Attack again, but a post-AA band with srs lyrics and 50s dad hair? There is great potential here…

Most of their media coverage refers to Beartooth as straight up “hardcore punk”, which seems like a massive oversimplification to me.  But then they crank out a 100% pure mosh song like “Dead” and I’m left scratching my head: just where do you draw the line between scene and tr00?? SYWH resident scene queen Ashley Overdrive even referred to this band as “powerviolence” (lol!); I don’t think anything else could summarize so well the gray area that Beartooth exists in.

hands down my fave track on the album. your most brutal moshe pitte awaits

I am just one man, not a fortune teller, so I won’t pretend like I hold the answers to these incredibly important questions. I will leave it to our readers: are Beartooth scene or tr00? Is DISGUSTING fake hardcore for your little sister, or “real metalcore” seen as an acceptable guilty pleasure for tr00 hardcore dorks? Will ISSUES, BEARTOOTH and THE GHOST INSIDE headline THIS IS HARDCORE in 10 years??

shomo

follow for more epic crabcore weight loss, like if your agree

Posted in bands i like, crabcore, hardcore, mesh shorts, metalcore, new jamz | Tagged , , , , , | 43 Comments

are the Crucial Dudes the American Football of pop punk?

crucial
Let’s take a look at the similarities:

- no one gave a crap about them when they were around – check
- gained a “cult status” after they broke up – check
- only one good song – check

So pretty much, with all these similarities, I would say that the Crucial Dudes are indeed the American Football of pop punk. I anticipate their return to the music scene when they inevitably re-unite due to popular demand (IE kids trying to impress each other via riding the underrated hype train all the way to played-outsville). I wouldn’t blame the band for trying to cash in on this either. I mean, as long as they’re not as embarrassing as American Foosball by making a music video for a song that’s 15 years old. Lol. C’mon son.

Here I leave you with the one good song from the Crucial Dudes. I do like this song a lot but mostly because it’s where Neck Deep (a far superior pop punk band) got their name from. Also I noticed that seems to be a trend in pop punk, bands naming themselves after other bands that aren’t as good as them. Like how Man Overboard is named after Blink 182 and how The Story So Far is named after New Found Glory. It seems like that would be the ultimate goal for musicians, to become better than the bands that influenced them, and these bands have definitely achieved that goal.

 

Posted in bands who are just ok, pop-punk | Tagged , | 31 Comments

if you miss myspace deathcore, check out SO THIS IS SUFFERING

Lots of us go through phases growing up. If you read this site and you were born in the early 90′s, chances are you went through a deathcore phase. You probably used Friend Blaster Pro to spam the fuck out of random people on MySpace to get them to listen to your crappy br00talcore band which sounded like 5,000 other crappy br00talcore bands in hopes that you might become the next JOB FOR A COWBOY or WHITECHAPEL (I myself was guilty of doing this with my old deathcore band).

But you probably grew out of it, as most people around you did, discarding every trace of your br00tal past (unless you stretched your ears past a 00 gauge and the holes didn’t close up). This isn’t the case for SO THIS IS SUFFERING though, who are dedicated in preserving authentic MySpace br00tality, the type of shit that would make any old school ponytail metalhead cower at the intensity.

logo vintage illegible deathcore logo

Music videos from smaller bands can tend to be pretty cringey lots of the time but this one is cool, even though it looks like it was shot using an instagram filter. Musically, I’m hearing some SUISIDE SILENCE influence. And obvi they’re jocking tr00 metal with the Cannibal Corpse and Aborted shirts (this has always been standard for deathcore).

Give them a like on Facebook and tell them SYWH sent you!

Posted in bands 2 watch for, deathcore | Tagged , , | 16 Comments

The Dumbest Common Reasons Why People Hate on Bands and the Types of People They Stem From

haters

Let’s be real for a second: hating on bands is pretty pointless. Now is the time when a bunch of people just thought to themselves “you could say that anything is pointless… you writing this article is pointless!”. Okay smart-ass, let me rephrase that: hating on bands just isn’t positive. Music sales (both digital and physical) continue to plummet every year and tons of kids would rather sit at home and reblog gifs of their favorite bands instead of going to see them at a show. Meanwhile, every band is scrambling to find the most bankable merch designs. The point I’m trying to get at is musicians need all the support they can get. The time and energy that people put into hating on a band could easily be substituted with helping support a band that they like.

angry

In all my years of music fandom, I’ve witnessed many different forms of hate from all different kinds of people. Whether it be from the comments of my YouTube videos, frequenting various message boards, or even standing behind some loud obnoxious dude in line at a show, I feel like I’ve pretty much heard it all. I am going to attempt to narrow down the most common dumb reasons why people hate on bands and try to identify the different types of people they usually stem from.

lets-get-started

Reason #1: Their music is too simple
The type of people it stems from: IMNs

I started with this one because it’s the easiest to trace its roots. This is predominantly a metal nerd thing. With “extreme metal” constantly pushing the boundaries of proficient musicianship and technical skill, it’s almost as if these people completely forgot that songwriting exists. They are too wrapped up in who has the fastest blastbeats or who has the craziest arpeggio sweeps. I remember I was at a party at my friend’s house and their band played, so they had all their instruments set up. After they played, some dude picked up my friend’s guitar, turned his amp up real loud and started sweeping in front of everyone at the party. The dude was really arrogant about it too, as if he thought that it actually made him cool. That’s like going to a party and showing off your Magic the Gathering cards. Thankfully, my friend promptly took the guitar away from him and told him that if he wanted to masturbate, he could do it at home. From then on, we referred to him as “sweep douche”.

tech
I will admit that this one somewhat boils down to personal taste but there still is a lot of ignorance to be had here. Lots of these people denounce mainstream pop music as a whole because what could be easier than playing in a band whose music is simplistic… making music that doesn’t involve any instruments at all! That’s pretty much where talent stops for them. They don’t take into account that writing a catchy song does require a special knack. Also, since there’s no instruments involved and you’re doing it all on a computer, the production aspect plays a huge role, which comes with its own set of skills and knowledge. So when some nerdy metal dude tells me he could easily make songs that are on the level of a god-tier pop artist like Ke$ha, my response is usually something like this…

cmonson
Reason #2: They’re just in it for the money
The type of people it stems from: Crusties/tr00 punx

Thank GOD this one is becoming less common nowadays because it’s easily the most cringe-worthy. Playing music for a living is arguably a thousand times cooler than any menial job. You would never go up to someone working at Subway and be like “you’re just in it for the money!” because of course they are, it’s just a given. But suddenly when it’s something cool like playing music then people should be shamed for it? Is that not the ultimate goal? To make money doing something you love? This is where people step in and say “well, they’re specifically playing a certain type of music to cater to a wide audience”. Even then, who gives a shit? Maybe they like that kind of music?

credibilitychart

I think probably the main reason that this type of mentality is becoming less common is because more and more people are beginning to realize that most bands don’t make a lot of money. It’d be pretty ridiculous to say that they eat raw noodles everyday, take pictures with underage girls and sleep in a van for any reason other than a genuine love for the music. Your favorite band may appear to be rockstars until the drummer is asking you what your pant size is at Zumiez.  I think that the money shaming mentality probably does still exist in small circles of crusty punx type people, but luckily they don’t have internet access under bridges and in squats, so we’re spared from their crappy opinions for the most part.

This video helped open my eyes to the horrors of touring in a mid-level popularity scenecore band.

Reason #3: They focus too much on image
The type of people it stems from: Kids who are concerned about their image

This critique is very typical for kids who are making their transition into Real Hardcore™. They want people to know that they’re all about the music now and that image doesn’t mean shit! So instead of repping pretty boy fangirled bands, they’re all about hardcore bands that are composed of casually dressed, average looking hardcore dudes. There is no way to escape it though really: every band has an image. Do you wear clothes? Then you have an image. You don’t think the hardcore scene cares about image? Try going to a Real Hardcore™ show wearing a Pierce the Veil shirt and tell me how many dirty looks you get. I’m serious.

piercetheveil
I remember one of the most cringey online arguments I got into happened back in the MySpace era with this dude who was making his unsurprising transition from metalcore to hardcore. He kept going on about how if you go to a metalcore band’s MySpace page, their layout is all fancy, whereas if you go to a Real Hardcore™ band’s MySpace, it’s just plain. This was supposed to show how hardcore bands don’t care about their image like metalcore bands do. Why would something as meaningless as a band’s MySpace layout even have any effect on how somebody feels about their music? That seems about as trivial to me as how attractive their merch guy is. This was a clear-cut example of a kid who was just as caught up in image as the bands he’s opposed to for the exact same reason. For them, it’s not about disregarding image altogether. It’s about disregarding the wrong image and acquiring the right one.

expireband

Reason #4: Their fanbase is unbearable
The type of people it stems from: Hipsters

This one is pretty clear. People want their favorite band to be their own special little thing, kind of like the special snowflake that they are trying to be. But then once the wrong people start liking a band they’re into, the music suddenly just magically starts sounding crappier to them I guess? I’m not really sure how this works. As far as bands with lots of fangirls/jailbait in their audience, I would much rather be associated with girls who develop crushes on band members than those try-hard elitist buttholes who can type up a 5 paragraph essay as to why they dislike Asking Alexandria. I guess that means I care about fanbase to a certain extent? Maybe I do. But I try not to let it stop me from enjoying the bands I like.

hipster1

Reason #5: They’re not original enough
The type of people it stems from: No Fun Clubbers

I can’t believe kids are still so hung up on originality. It’s like to them, music is some pissing contest to see who has the most artistic integrity. I mean, let’s say you love a band. Then another band came along and sounded mostly like them, with such subtle nuances that they didn’t really matter. Wouldn’t you like the rip off band too? I mean, I see it as essentially having more songs from the band you initially loved. Why do you care about someone else’s musical integrity? Sure, if you want to suck your own dick then that’s all on you, but why hold others to the same expectations? When I’m listening to a song I like, I’m usually too wrapped up in just enjoying the music to care about how much I respect the person who made it for being innovative or not.

generic1

Take this into consideration: genres came into existence based on the fact that someone came up with a formula that was likable enough for other people to want to emulate. There are probably plenty of super original bands out there that will never be known outside of the basement that they jam in because their music is so unappealing that no one would ever want to listen to it or sound like them. I will admit that innovation in music is important to a certain extent, because listening to the same type of thing over and over gets boring. But there are lots of kids out there that are acting like every single band has to reinvent the wheel, which is just stupid and unrealistic. Plenty of my favorite bands are generic and I actually wish more people ripped off some of the more unique sounding bands that I like so that I could have more songs in the vein of that band to listen to.

“Gutt-hop” is a genre that adds guttural death metal vocals over hip-hop beats. Ever heard of it? No? There’s probably a reason for that.

Reason #6: The band members are bad people
The type of people it stems from: Gullible people

This criticism is sort of complicated because it can range all the way from unconfirmed rumors and gossip involving mild offenses, to band members who have legit done horrible, unforgivable things (IE Ian Watkins). With that said, it’s pretty easy to spread false shit about band members and there are plenty of kids who eat it up and actually let it effect their opinion of the band. A dude in a band could easily be misconstrued as an ‘asshole’ because he’s shy or socially awkward. Lots of people who make up these criticisms are probably super sensitive and get bummed out when a band member doesn’t stop to talk to them for longer than 5 minutes as if he doesn’t have other shit to do.

ronnie
As far as band members who have legit done bad things, I don’t let it effect the way I perceive the music, but I don’t think I’ve experienced a situation where a member of a band I like has done anything that bad. I would imagine that Jeremy McKinnon would have to do some pretty fucked up shit for me to view A Day To Remember’s music in a different light. Actually, who am I kidding, there is nothing that Jeremy McKinnon could do to stop me from enjoying A Day To Remember’s music. Music and the people who make it are two separate entities to me, with the latter not having an effect on the music, and really not having that much importance at all.

jeremy

Reason #7: They’re trend-hoppers
The type of people it stems from: Naive people

I couldn’t think of a better way to describe these people other than naive. They’re naive because they have this weird idea that any band that’s playing a style that is currently trendy is somehow “exploiting” the music scene. What they don’t realize that there’s not really much to exploit. Most likely, the best thing that will happen to a band is that they’ll play in front of 50 or so kids (half of which they’re friends with), sell a couple of t-shirts, and maybe hook up with a mildly attractive groupie if they’re lucky. Most bands that form do not end up achieving more success than this. I’ll use an example of one of the comments that was left on my pop punk article I posted last week. I talked about a band from Britain called Nathan Detroit and how they could potentially join the ranks of the more popular British pop punk bands such as Me vs Hero and Neck Deep. This was that dude’s response…

dumbcomment
I am simultaneously cringing and laughing at this comment so hard. He has this idea in his head that bands like Neck Deep and Me vs Hero (and even ROAM? Is he for real?) are these sellout rockstar bands because they have more than 4,000 likes on Facebook and can draw more than 65 kids at a show. It’s like, just because they knew what type of music they wanted to play and who their audience was, that means they’re trendy disingenuous posers who didn’t have to work hard for what they achieved. These are the types of people who say things like ”that band is only in it for the popularity”. Seriously? What band doesn’t want to get popular? If you know your audience, then cater to them. It’s the obvious thing to do if you want your band to be successful. If there’s a t-shirt design that you know kids would probably buy, then print those t-shirts and sell them! How is this seen as a bad thing?

epilogue1

One thing I have realized with these criticisms is that they usually don’t even have much to do with the music itself. It’s weird how often I hear them compared to things like “I don’t like the guitar tone” or “the singer’s voice annoys me”. I guess that’s what happens when certain groups of people are very vocal about their strong excessive negative opinions. My guess is a lot of these people don’t even necessarily hold these criticisms true to their heart and they more-so want to impress people by showing that they ‘really know a lot about music’, when they’re really just regurgitating stereotype elitist mentalities that should have never been instilled in the first place. I hope that in the future, kids can avoid hating and invest more into the bands they love. Isn’t that’s why we’re all here in the first place? Because we love music? So go to a show, buy a band’s merch, tell them you like them, just please try not be a hater.

fronz
Do you think bands get hated on too much? What do you think is the dumbest reason to hate on a band? Are you a hater?

Posted in butthurt, haters, no fun club, what we think about stuff | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 143 Comments

Pop Punk bands to check for in 2014!!! #stayposi #defendpoppunk #pizza

parkertwitterParker’s so funny xD

First up we got KNUCKLE PUCK. Don’t let the fact that the singer looks like McLovin fool you, these guys are from the dangerous streets of Chiraq. #turnup. They are also my second favorite band with the word “knuckle” in it (right behind Five Knuckle Chuckle). I love the lyrics to this song. “I don’t think about you anymore!!… even though I just wrote an entire song about you!”

This pop punk band wrote a song about Parker Cannon’s chest xD. So much teen angst in this video. Wait, the guitarist is balding and has a Strung Out tattoo. Nvm. The singer looks like what we thought Josh from Drake & Josh would grow up to look like.

These guys are Canadian so that means they are part of #themasterrace. Mirin’ the bassist’s hockey jersey. He pulls it off better than any member of Neck Deep. Hosers > posers. Sry Neck Deep, I still <3 u. It’s cool that there’s lots of girls in the crowd even though they’re all like 15 (then again, so is the band probably). Maybe one day they can pull as many quality hoes as da gawds in SEAWAY.

This band is composed of Jarrod Alonge from “Every Pop Punk Vocalist” fame and some dude who uploads covers onto YouTube with lots of autotune that Bryan Stars wants to fuck real bad (source: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zrjDoXd3a8w). “I’m just gonna interview u on the bed in this hotel room is that cool? and don’t mind me, I’m just gonna sit rly close to u and talk to u about penises”. 

These guys mix modern pop punk with djenty guitar parts. This is a rare case of when being original isn’t totally wack. The breakdown at 2:17 is advanced. Who would’ve thought that playing pop punk could actually require talent? And by talent, I mean masturbating on your 8 string for 5 hours a night to sweep tutorials.

beta

whoever made this is on like a whole new level of beta

I found this video in my bookmarked pages in-between “Boy Samples Horny Stepmoms Sweet Pussy” and “Chayse Evans BBC Anal”. I clicked on it by accident instead of the video below it, although the singer’s facial expressions are quite similar to the ones the girl makes in the video I was trying to watch. These guys aren’t even really pop punk (then again, is most stuff that gets called pop punk nowadays actually pop punk?) but I like them a lot. Plus they’re Canadian so I gotta represent.

Speaking of BBC, these guys are from Britain. I think they have what it takes to join the ranks of fellow Englishmen ME VS HERO and NECK DEEP, they just need to get their buzz up and keep trying to sound American when they sing.

I get strong EpiFat vibes from this song so hopefully it’s an early sign of the forthcoming #skatepunkrevival. Why does that dude try to kiss the singer at 30 seconds? He’s not Parker Cannon, bro. We need to put an end to pop punk singers getting sexually assaulted on stage. It’s just not posi.

You might have heard about this band from their singer because he does not shut the fuck up about it. Nevertheless, they are very good and should be on people’s radar… willingly or not.

Lastly, we have Smalls, who have made this beautiful homage to a Get Up Kids music video. They must have read Bronson’s guide on what to listen to in order to have advanced “old school” tastes in 2014. Using Stuff You Will Hate’s cutting edge knowledge to further their band? Well played Smalls, well played. Bronson is always on point with his predictions. Hopefully he doesn’t write an article predicting the impending demise of the pop punk genre as a whole. That would make this post look pretty pointless. Wait, shit…

pizzaokay, time for me to go eat Pizza now xD later bros, & remember to always stay posi!

Posted in bands 2 watch, bands 2 watch for, bands i like, pop-punk | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 29 Comments