New Jamz: New Boyz f/t J Bigga "Oh Snap!"

Hay y'all I don't have a lot of time today but I want to tell you about the newest song from J-Bigga, an up-and-coming DIY crunkcore MC from the Las Vegas area. He has a new song called "Oh Snap!" that I saw on YouTube the other day and I wanted to make sure that you peeped it because I think u will be hearing a lot about this bro in the future! He also looks like the scene version of Criss Angel so he has the killer combo of talent and pro image that make him a personality to watch. He's a shooting star, and if you hang on, he'll take you all the way to the top!

--

--

I love his proactive approach to self-promotion, rly makes the most of YouTube annotations to "get his brand out there"

J-Bigga uses Photoshops to make himself sparkle like Edward

I am not sure how he pulled it off, but somehow he got the popular hip hop/crabcore artists New Boyz to appear on this track. Maybe he just bugged them a lot until they finally were like "OK fine here's a drop that took us 5 seconds to do," kind of like how that kid from Dot Dot Curve/Scene Kidz pestered BrokeNCYDE to do a collabo until they finally broke down and sent him a verse that they banged out in a half hour or so.

Note the MC rocking a Pierce The Veil shirt at 1:03

I feel like bothering more popular bands is a really good way to enrich your own personal brand so I might start doing that in the future since it seems to work rly well for J-Bigga and the bro from Scene Kidz. Mb I need to find out who runs Stickydrama and start calling them at home until they agree to write a guest post for SYWH?? What do u think will take SYWH to "the next lvl"???

--

--

In this video, they explain that skinny jeans r hip hop 2. In regards to haters, they hearin it, but they ain't fittin' to change.

J-Bigga on MySpace
New Boyz on MySpace

Stuff You Will Hate appears on NPR; crunkcore legitimized by ex-Sleater Kinney member

In what might be the most surreal, irony-laden moment of my life, a recent NPR blog post mentioned Stuff You Will Hate as a source for information on crunkcore. As if it couldn't get any funnier, the writer of the post (Carrie Brownstein) used to be in fucking SLEATER KINNEY, who I saw many times growing up in the Seattle punk scene of the early 90s. If I had to make a list of people unlikely to have any interest at all in SYWH, she would be at the very top, so I'm stoked to count her as a reader!

Her former band

I am very grateful for the link, because I've gotten a lot of traffic from it, and most likely from people who would normally never read this site. Thanks babe! Even though I mostly listen to Hatebreed and Demolisher these days, I actually do like Sleater Kinney. And I'm not into indie chicks, but in Carrie's case I would- she's got a certain charm about her, maybe it's because I *am* into Jewish girls??

Read the NPR post here

Bands 2 Watch: Dorrough "Ice Cream Paintjob"

When I'm not rocking out to the latest scene jamz, I usually bump some Southern rap. Here's my new favorite song, "Ice Cream Paint Job" by Dorrough. If you don't like this you DEFINITELY hate fun.

Yea My Shows Be Krunk

http://www.myspace.com/dorroughmusic

Starve yourself to death the SCENE way

If there is anything the world needs, it's new ways for us to feel insecure about ourselves- especially innovative ways to make young girls feel fat. OK, so maybe not. I guess that's actually the last thing the world needs, which is why I was quite dismayed to find these "scene thinspiration" videos on YouTube. If you're not familiar with thinspiration, here's how Urban Dictionary defines it:

An anorexic's version of 'inspiration'. They gain inspiration to be as thin as certain celebrities by looking at their pictures and videos. Some make slideshow videos of thin girls such as Nicole Richie, Nicky Grahame, Lexi Lush, Victoria Beckham, Keira Knightley etc..and put the videos on YouTube. Some make 'thinspiration walls' which are noticeboards with photos of thin girls pinned up.

You can find some examples at Prettythin.com (it's pretty gross, though, so I don't advise looking at it), or in the videos below that combine pictures of really thin girls with the music of widely-hated bands like BrokeNCYDE, Millionaires, and Attack Attack. I really can't think of a better example of Stuff You Will Hate than this, since it even grosses me out!

BrokeNCYDE version
--

--

This is a very unfortunate application of the line "Oh my god this bitch is fat, she'll totally squash my skinny ass!"

I honestly don't know what to say about this because it's soooooo fucked up. I'm sure none of these bands would be stoked on having their music used like this, especially not Owl City or Four Year Strong, but they'll be associated with it anyway.

How is there this much space between her thighs?! It's the width of her entire head! Does she have hip dysplasia??

And I'm not sure if the person who made a Millionaires thinspiration video has seen a picture of them, but they're not exactly the skinniest girls out there (to be clear, I think they are lovely and adorable as I wrote about when I called Melissa the world's first scene balloon).

Attack Attack version
--

--

Attack Attack's old singer looks like a butch lesbian, but they also wear size 26 girl jeans so I guess I can see how they would be appropriate for a video like this

Well there you have it. If this doesn't make you mad, I have nothing left for you. You can also waste away to the sweet sounds of other scene faves (please consider how dismayed Four Year Strong in particular would be about being included in one of these videos):
Owl City
Four Year Strong

Peep this 17 year old's Brokencyde, Dot Dot Curve, and Hollywood Undead tats

I fully support getting shitty band tattoos when you are a teenager. I have several, including a Morbid Angel one that I got from Chris Chisholm (original guitarist in All Out War) in a girls' kitchen circa 1998. That was spectacularly bad judgment on my part, but I am going to say this bro has me beat. He is 17 and currently has the following tattoos:

"Yea I'm The Sex," a song by Indiana-based DIY Crunkcore pioneers Dot Dot Curve

His caption from MySpace: "scratched in my leg represent hollywood undead." Sweet, they rule. But, uh, what IS this??

And of course his "BC13" Brokencyde tattoo. This is going to look even better in 5 or so years, don't you think??

He also cites "Heathe Ledger" as his hero and writes poetry like this:

My Life....

My life is dead, my heart has bled
I wake up to this hell, undead
I feel ive fucking lost my head
So shedding blood, i lay in bed
The phone is screaming, am i dead
Or just insane with all my pain
My eyes are dry, will it rain
Course through my veins leaving stains
Of lonliness and little bliss, fuck this emptyness
Crush my pills, i feel im ill
I snort them up, i hold a forty
Forgetting names, am i to blame
Now in this flame, i feel ashamed
Everyday alone in fear without my dear
I hear ringing in my ears
As i fall asleep in my fear, hold me near
Depressed and stressed, alone i rest.

Check out this bro on MySpace

Fall Jamz 2K9: Breathe Carolina "Tripped And Fell In Portland"

This song is the perfect example of what Stuff You Will Hate is all about: Something I 10000% non-ironically love but almost everybody else I know will violently hate. For any new readers, SYWH is a spinoff from my other blog, Metal Inquisition, where I usually write about death metal and hardcore bands like Infernal Revulsion and Demolisher. They got butthurt when I wrote about anything that wasn't metal from the early 90s, so I made this blog (which is still a work in progress- new design coming very soon).

This is the catchiest shit since Forever The Sickest Kids "I Don't Know About You But I Came To Dance" and I hope it blows up, 3OH!3 style. Speficially, I want to hear this on the receptionist's radio every time I walk past the front desk at work just like I did with "Don't Trust Me."

Anyhow, I was at the OSU Finish Line the other day to up buying some Nike Skylines in the sick colorway above when I heard a ridiculously catchy melody on the in-store music. Listening closer, I heard screaming over trancey synths and was like "WTF, this song is scene as fuck- what is it, and why am I hearing it here of all places?"

They have a pretty cool brand going on, with some of the better merch designs in the genre. Bros, if you're reading this, hit up my Flickr and drop me a line, it would be fun to make some shirts for you!

I looked up the lyrics was surprised to find out it was Breathe Carolina a pair a neon-clad skinny dudes from Denver whose music never really grabbed me before. Not unlike their fellow Colorado residents 3OH!3 or the Kefka-meets-Jeffree Starr stylings of Blood On The Dancefloor, they play a fun and accessible mix of trance/techno and poppy rock with screamo touches here and there. Although Buddyhead slammed this record pretty hard, they got it right when they said that Breathe Carolina are the fancy-lad, crybaby version of Brokencyde. I like to think of Breathe Carolina as what might happen if Taylor Swift tried to make a sleazy crunkcore record. She would come back with a song called "I Like You, Do You Like Me?" where she tried to rap over some Fruity Loops preset and you'd be like, "Aw, sweetie, that's not very crunk... But I can tell you tried hard, here's a cookie and your blankie."

I bet these dudes try to make girls think they're sleazy creeps like Hollywood Undead, but by the end of the night end up curled up in the fetal position, sobbing quietly in bed next to the 18 year-old scene girl they brought back to the crib. They choke back the tears just long enough to make puppy dog eyes at her and say, "W-will you just... hold me for a while??"

Needless to say, even normally astute outlets like Buddyhead hate this band passionately, demonstrating something we already knew: Hipsters and punk rockers get old, cranky and clueless just like everybody else. They lose touch with new developments in youth culture, and new songs like this one make them confused and angry. I'm sure it will happen to me some day too, and when it does I ask you to just smother me with a pillow in my sleep. I honestly don't get it though: Buddyhead put out the fucking Shat CD, so it's kind of baffling how they are so out-of-touch, thin-skinned, and basically just completely old and clueless as to say shit like this in their review:

At this point, I’m not sure I even like music anymore, and so don’t care if crab-core kills me. But I’d still like to point out that this shit isn’t fair. I don’t deserve this. No one deserves Breathe Carolina. Not Hitler and not Sean Hannity and not Fred Durst. Yet, this “record,” Hello Fascination, sits stocked in stores, waiting patiently for victims to come upon it’s rainbow-jizz sprayed cover. Innocent people are going to suffer.

Really?! Are you that upset by a rainbow? If so, you might consider re-evaluating the extent to which you decide to care what a couple like 21 year-old scene kids put on the cover of their record. If he was just exaggerating in hopes of getting readers, fine- but even then, honestly they whole "ZOMG I HATE CRUNKCORE/CRABCORE/SCENE" thing that every fucking site ever does is super, super played out. It's not interesting anymore, this shit has been around for a long time, and it just makes these writers sound like their parents complaining about how "you can't even understand the words!" Next step is putting a plastic cover on the couch and the transformation into Mr. Armstrong, ,my 7th grade gym teacher, is complete.

This could be the last thing the Buddyhead dude ever sees!

If these old people aren't careful, they're going to nerd-rage themselves to an early grave. It will go something like this:

(Guy from Buddyhead arrives at the show and confronts the band)
Buddyhead dude: "Hey you little assholes, I've got a bone to pick with you. What IS this crap kids these days listen to?! Why, back in my day we had REAL MUSIC! We listened to the classics: Black Flag, Napalm Death, Eazy-E, none of this neon merch garbage with the rapping and the Pokemon hair or whatever they call it... And one more thing- ARGGH!!"
(Falls to the floor clutching his head, quivers for a few seconds, then lays still)
Breathe Carolina Scenebro 1: Whoa, dude... I think that old guy just like died, bro!
Breathe Carolina Scenebro 2: Holy shit, haha! That was kind of awesome, he hates us so much he like made his own brain explode or some shit!!
Breathe Carolina Scenebro 1: Seriously! Do you think we should like, do something? Maybe we should- oh snap, look over there- I think it's that girl Britney that's been sweating me on Buzznet, I'm gonna go see what's up. Shake n bake, dawg!!
(the Scenebros do their secret handshake and part ways, leaving the Buddyhead guy's corpse on the floor, quickly growing cold and stiff as kids walk past him laughing and having fun, completely oblivious to his presence)

My message to people like Buddyhead and other haters is this: It's not worth it, dudes. If you don't like this shit, that's cool, you don't have to. But I think you should let it go and move on with your life. It's not healthy to be so angry! And getting back to the original point of this post, this song is rad and I will be playing it on the regular this fall.

I feel like Boss are "really listening to me"

Thx to this Questionable Content thread for the image and treasure trove of other Stuff You Will Hate material

Hyperviolence on "The Black BrokeNCYDE"

I am a big fan of Hyperviolence and you should be too. All his posts are solid, but he really stepped it up with his latest post on N!tro, the so-called "Black BrokeNCYDE":

Feels good that screamo crunk could be becoming some kind of subcultural utopia, with an equal racial cross section. This may simply be due to the fact that all scene kids/scene wiggers are pretty middle class, by which black middle class people are also sort of wiggers too, in that they are just as alien to the inside of a Mobb Deep lyrics sleve as white middle class kids, but feel like they have to live up to that image anyway, therefore, racial devide becomes completely meaningless, as everyone works together to chase that golden grail: being truly "street/black". I myself see N!tro as the scene answer to Martin Luther King.

There is way more than that, you really need to read the whole post, but I don't want to spoil it so read the whole thing for yourself!

Bree Bree fan video

Pretty hilarious fan video for "Bree Bree," check it out!

Scene kids worth blogging about: Dropping A Popped Locket

Greenwood, Indiana is apparently the crunkcore capital of the world, with Dot Dot Curve, Scene Kidz, and now Dropping A Popped Locket all hailing from one of Indianapolis' lamest suburbs. Of course, all three bands are basically the same people, kind of like how Internal Bleeding, Pyrexia and Suffocation were an incestuous family back in the early 90s. There must be something in the water over there in Indiana that's inspiring all these kids- my guess is lead or industrial waste.

I have no clue what "Dropping A Popped Locket" means, but I read this bro's MySpace and felt very sorry for him. He moved from Queens to Indiana specifically to be a member of Dot Dot Curve... oof! I don't love Queens, but jesus fuck, voluntarily moving to Indiana is like using a time machine to travel back in time and raping yourself as a child.

After watching DAPL locket live, my head is spinning just like the scenebro in the empty lot in the image above! Watch this video in which he stands on a stage in some park in Ohio and screams over prerecorded music while 10 or so entry-level scene kids mosh like they have traumatic brain injuries.



I will give him credit, though, he has some really hot scene girls in the fan art album on his MySpace. Do yourself a favor and take a look through it. As always, though, the most interesting thing about these bands is their less attractive, socially functional fans. Here are a few of my favorite DAPL groupies.

He is disarmingly earnest, urging viewers of this image to listening to DAPL in the kind of broken, repetitive language I usually associate with the homeless or religious cultists. Also, what's the skeleton all about?? Keep an eye on this dude, I'm pretty sure you'll be seeing him soon on a postcard notifying you that a sex offender has moved into your neighborhood.

This bro is equally sincere, but takes a much more direct approach in his advocacy. OK, man, I'll listen!! Don't hurt me! It's fuckin' crunk dude, now stop twisting my arm!!

I would love to use this image as evidence in a custody dispute, I can't think of a better trump card than laying this down on the judge's desk. "Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, I rest my case."

In this image, DAPL preens himself in the bathroom mirror of his $300 a month apartment

Uh... I really don't know what the fuck to say about this... but I would like some of whatever the artist was taking when they made this!!

Their live show looks like it is as electrifying as Scene Kidz' stellar performances at Tha Plaza. You can feel the energy crackling in the air in the images below, with nearly a dozen dumpy scenebros standing behind the OfficeMax card tables.

They had to be done by 3PM to make way for the Greenwood Senior Center's Thursday bingo night. Also, it looks like he is wearing flared jeans... not just bootcut, but straight up FLARED. Maybe they were having a sale on LEI at Dillards?

Perhaps most amazingly of all, he covers the, er, "legendary" punk band Blanks 77! This is truly a high water mark for mash culture, as he explains in a MySpace blog:

Wednesday, July 15, 2009

Why I covered Blanks 77 Current mood: artistic cuz everyone should have heard of them, they are an old school punk band from new jersey who is not getting enough credit, http://www.myspace.com/blanks77 , they we're a huge inspiration while growing up and starting music, I have seen them live and performed vocals live for one song on stage with them. Also been fortunate enough to play some shows with them with my old punk band.

Dropping A Popped Locket on MySpace
SYWH's post on Scene Kidz
Coverage of DAPL, DDC and Scene Kidz in some shitty Indiana paper

(I would just like to take a moment to point out that I LOLd just now because I am listening to the 90s moshcore band Conviction as I type this, which struck me as pretty funny for some reason)

Deviant Art = treasure trove of BrokeNCYDE lulz

I could probably make an entire blog just of retarded shit from Deviant Art, there is a seemingly infinite supply of material there such as the amazing caption to this photograph of Se7en from BrokeNCYDE. Why does he get all the love, anyway?? I like Mikl better, and Antz is totally underrated in his own right. It's bullshit that everyone focuses on Se7en but I guess that's just the way it goes with boy bands.

Photo courtesy of Jazzcatnya. Make sure you check out her other work, such as her Sweeney Todd cosplay photos!

FOR ALL THE CRUNK KIDS IN THE HAWSE!

This is Se7en from Brokencyde. xD gah he looks teh HiLaRiOuSlY awesumz!!!!

Yayyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! The concert was AWESOMES!!! Everyone was so nice, and then got a couple of the other band member's autographs! (MIKL and PHAT J's who are cool as shit,too). It was a very casual and small concert, but so much fun and we started a moshpit!

If you want to hear what Brokencyde sounds like go to [link] !!!

They have concerts all over the place coming up every day until august something, so chances are they'll be playing somewhere near you, bwahaha.

The other bands that are touring with them are Eyes Set to Kill, And then there were None, and Drop Dead Gorgeous. ( hadn't heard them prior to this concert but they were pretty good none-the-less, so check them out too).

GET FUCKIN CRUNK!!!!

Scene kids worth blogging about: Sarah Synicism

Baby has downs?

In this series of posts, I will blog about noteworthy scene kids on MySpace, Buzznet, or in this case Deviant Art. This post is about a girl from England named Sarah Synicism, who enjoys drawing. I will admit that it is mean to pick on some teenager's shitty art for the amusement of my bitter, jaded friends who are twice as old, but fuck it. We all do retarded shit when we're teenagers, the difference is that when I was 16, the Internet wasn't there to record all of it for eternity. Unfortunately for Sarah Synicism, the same is not true for her generation, which seems to thrive on embarrassing itself online.

Let's just start off with a bang: a fucking anime-style drawing of Se7en from BrokeNCYDE!! When I found this I felt like I had discovered a vein of gold that would make even the most grizzled 49er jump with joy. I like how she wrote down all her favorite lines from BC13 songs, which all seem to be the ones where he brags about how tight his game is. All of them are pretty straightforward and self-explanatory except for the one on the bottom right: "Don't you lie. I'm bulemic, I can read your mind." That one is not so clear to me, but what do I know? I have pretty good game for sure, but it's safe to say that Se7en (or Steven, as his mother calls him) is on a whole other level in that department.

This image is entitled "Scene Poster," but an alternate title could be "Stuff That Sergeant D Is Into." For example, on the left it says "HARDCORE." I love hardcore! Who knew she was a fan of All Out War, Bulldoze, NYC Mayhem, Merauder and Excessive Force?! It just goes to show, you can't stereotype. She is also a big fan of Forever The Sickest Kids. In case you think I am joking when I say that they are my favorite band of the last five years or so, please take a look at my Last.fm charts (as of now, I have listened to them about 1,200 times). I'll be honest, I think Hello Kitty is a little played out, but I am a big fan of other Sanrio and San-X characters like Afro Ken, Kogepan, and especially Landry. If you're ever in Pittsburgh, go to an awesome little store called Kawaii and stock up!

This drawing is adapted from The Medic Droid's song "The Killer Anna." Apparently she also suffers from some kind of learning disability in addition to fetal alcohol syndrome, because as you can see she wrote "The Killer Amma" instead. Let's take a closer look at the face:

I think those grey things are supposed to be piercings of some kind, but they look more like some kind of growth to me, maybe warts or zits. Either way, seems like something she should have a doctor look at! I think they can lance those things right in the office these days. Also, that is one fucked up nose. What is she, a pro fighter? I do like her raccoon hair, though. The girl who served me at the pizza place tonight had some stripes like that, it was cute.


I do not think she understands why it is ironic to have these two images next to each other. I'm curious what she thinks when she listens to BrokeNCYDE, though. Let's examine the lyrics to "40oz" to see if we can't get an answer:

Let's get crunk tonight, baby girl you got my digits
Hit me up about ten, I'll be over in a minute
I'll ease open, you got a G hopin'
And I'ma get up in those jeans with those knees open
Now take your panties off girl (HAND ME THE FORTY OUNCE!)
Get you sweating in 'em too (HAND ME THE FORTY OUNCE!)
I'm about to show you what your boyfriend can't do
I'm a celebrity baby, Brokencyde is my crew
And there ain't nuttin' you can do so FUCK YOU!

Now drink your bottles up
We will get fucked up
All these bitches in the the club always lookin' for some love
Get your sex on
Go get your sex on girl
Get your sex on
Go get your sex on girl

I know what I think, which is "Fuck yeah bro, let's go get fuckin crunk, where's that 40?!" But that's just me, I can only guess at what goes on inside her feeble mind.

This is a drawing of the singer for Pierce The Veil. I know what you are thinking: "What the fuck would possess this bitch to put this drawing on the internets? I have no idea who this guy is, but she made him look like a gay elf who's undergone several rounds of reconstructive surgery after getting hit in the face with a cannonball." As it turns out, she is not all that happy with it either:

I hate this drawing on seven different levels. *sigh* this always happens when I attept to draw realistic people. But it was a comission from a good friend of mine, and I couldn't tell her no. I just hope she likes it.

As you can see, she didn't want to do this drawing, she had to! After all it was "a commission" and she couldn't let her fans down. She likes Pierce the Veil so much that she even posted her notes from Literature class, adorned with their name:

Before you think she is some bandwagon-hopping trend zombie, check out her favorite bands, full of obscurities that would impress even the most jaded "I only like the demo" dickbag:

I listen to music most people have never heard of, or don't wish to hear. Bring Me The Horizon. My Chemical Romance. Mayday Parade. Panic At The Disco. Aiden. Breathe Carolina. The Medic Droid(rip). Framing Hanley. Alesana. Cute Is What We Aim For. All Time Low. The Misfits. Blaqk Audio. (&& suprisingly)Eminem.(wtf?) And, I'll just stop there.

Oh, and she has one more thing to share:

Vitiam Water is my addiction.

Scene Kidz get crunk or die with BrokeNCYDE

For my inaugural post on Stuff You Will Hate, I will introduce you to the only current challengers to BrokeNCYDE's crunkcore crown: Scene Kidz, straight out of Greenwood, Indiana. Yes, you read that correctly, these kids are from a crappy suburb of Indianapolis that is a dump even by the remarkably low standards of Indiana (although I hear the Hampton's Market there is off the fuckin chain).

This song is entitled "Scene Kids," by the band Scene Kidz. The next song on the playlist is "Punks," by the band Punx.

Let me begin my introducing you to the members, the descriptions are from their MySpace, which is as awesome as you would expect:

:JReck:

:Bad Ass Beats:
:Rap:
:Singer:
(he is also a dad- Happy Father's Day bro, I can't wait until your kids are old enough to throw themselves on a sword when they see pictures of you looking like this)

:EnVy:
:White Girl Rap:
:Singer:
(This girl has pretty awesome hair, but like I said on Metal Inquisition the other day, you can only polish a turd so much... and the harder you try, the more shit you get on your hands, and it's still a turd)

:Spanky:
:Rap:
:Screamer:
:Being A Fag:
(Hey bro, you said it, not me...)

I know what you are thinking: what kind of a fucking name is Scene Kidz? Isn't that like when Dismember imaginatively titled their album "Death Metal"? I'll grant you that it's a bit intellectually lazy, but like Dismember's album, the name doesn't lie. They are indeed scene kids, albeit rather homely Midwest ones. Despite being entry-level in pretty much every respect, these kids definitely know how to get crunk when it comes to their music!



I am not sure how these dorks pulled it off, but they somehow managed to do this song with Se7en from BrokeNCYDE which I have been listening to on repeat all day. Since this blog is about stuff I love, and I'm spending most of this post making fun of these jerks, I should emphasize that I seriously do love this song- in fact, I came dangerously close to buying their album on iTunes before I came to my senses and pirated it.


In any case, obviously at least 90% of the reason you start a crunkcore band is to get laid, and I certainly can't argue with that logic. Scene girls are fucking hot, right? Who wouldn't want to bang a different groupie at every stop of the tour?? Nothing makes me feel more alive than rolling those dice every night, hoping I don't get mouth AIDS from Kimmy Katastrophy or Susie Scene!! So at first I was a little envious of Scene Kidz, especially Spanky (not so much JReck because of what must be his accidental child).

I thought "WTF I bet this little asshole bangs the hottest fucking chicks, why wasn't I in a sweet band like this when I was a kid?!" But then I saw the photo above, and it was like the record skipped, my blood ran cold as reality set in: they'd love you to believe they're getting up in Hannah Beth every night, but the truth is that Spanky has to settle for his porky bandmate to keep him warm at night. I explored the "Fan Creations" album on their MySpace and found some horrors that would make Lovecraft leave the lights on at night:

Apparently Professor Snape likes crunkcore

Protip: You can't stop Tons of Fun here from sending in images like this, but you are not obligated to actually include them in your albums!!

It wasn't just their fan creations that made me think Scene Kidz' lives were not really as crunk as their songs would lead you to believe. Digging deeper, I found some pictures of what seems to be their only "show." Now I have been to some pathetic fucking shows in my day but this looks like a next-level attendance/enthusiasm fail. This beats the infamous Pittsburgh fest of 1996 in terms of public embarrassment! Rent America had nothing on these guys.

"Tha Plaza" has industrial carpet, cheap blinds, and a PA that consists of a single 12" speaker... awesome venue

Both people at the "show" seem to be having a moderately good time as Spanky apologizes for being born.

So there you have it: Nobody's life is truly crunk 24/7. Scene Kidz have a ways to go before they're going to dethrone BC13 from their position as Kings of Crunkcore, but they're still pretty damn good. Maybe one of these days they can ask the assistant manager at Pac Sun for some time off. Spanky and JReck can spend a little time honing their stagecraft while Envy hits the gym.