Who is your favorite drummer??

Drummers are a sad bunch: usually the most talented musician in the band, yet cursed with poor social skills and stuck behind their kit, few people even realize they exist (other than other drummers). I am a sucker for an underdog, so this post will draw a little attention to the unsung drummers that have shaped the way I play.

Most drum nerds only seem to care how fast you can play, but at my advanced age I'm over that. I like a blast beat, double bass or whatever as much as the next guy, but I'm more into drummers who play their set like it's an instrument, not a physical challenge. Nor do I really care for the Dave Weckls, Mike Portnoys or Steve Gadds of the world who can play their balls off, but are in the worst fucking bands known to man (cough Chick Corea Elektric Band cough).

There are few things more annoying than a drummer who overplays, so I appreciate guys who have some technical skill, but do not use it for evil (like making stupid drum solo videos on youtube or playing in riff salad death metal bands). Since I grew up listening to a lot of rap, I especially like drummers who are super tight, hard hitting, and use lots of quirky accents and syncopation to make the song interesting without overwhelming the rest of the band.

John Stanier - Helmet

The grandfather of the hard-hitting, stripped-down, ultra-syncopated school of metal/hardcore drumming is without a doubt John Stanier. His playing a perfect example of what I aspire to as a drummer: At first listen, you might think this song is almost absurdly simple, but try to play it and see if you still think so. It starts off with a left-lead, 16th note run UP the kit, then back down-- this is where Stanier's time in drum corp playing quints and quads becomes obvious.

Travis Barker - Blink 182

Other than perhaps Carter Beauford of DMB, no mainstream drummer of the past 20 years is better than Travis Barker. Blink-182 was just another half-assed, So Cal pop punk band until he joined, and it's obvious why. His stage presence, songwriting sense, and technique are all unparalleled, and he's clearly influenced a whole generation of kids. His marching-band background is obvious if you know what to listen for, and I love how he throws in weird little things like the breakdown at :37 in the song above-- super innovative and interesting without distracting from the song.

Oh, and you can thank him for popularizing the 1990s Inland Empire-bro style-- every time you see a skinny little wigneck in Dickies shorts, skate shoes with cholo-style high socks, and a flat-brim hat, think of your boy Travis.

John Longstreth - Origin

This is one of the few metal drummers who is at all interesting to me, mostly because he's basically playing 311 beats at tempos that are three or four times faster. It's really hard to do anything tasteful or nuanced when you're playing at 250 bpm, but Longstreth does it-- for example, just the slight variation in volume of snare hits during his blasts is enough to make what would otherwise be an incredibly dull, generic death metal song really unique and interesting. For those of you who like to jack off to insane speed, just go to about 3:20-- this is the guy who invented the gravity blast (yes, I know it's an old jazz technique).

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Chad Sexton - 311

Nobody will admit to liking 311, but I have always thought they were a brilliant rock band who have a great pop sense-- the perfect soundtrack for getting the mnstrm party started in summer. Aside from having great songs, you will simply not find a cleaner, tighter, more precise drummer than Chad Sexton. Another veteran of drum corp (see his DCI testimonial here), his playing is incredibly tasteful, but if you know what to listen for, he plays plenty of technical shit that's kind of mind blowing.

Ken Schalk - Candiria

In the late 90s, there were a number of hardcore/metal bands experimenting with jazz influences, but none of them did it better than Candiria. This was mostly due to Ken and his drumming, who brought all the good parts of 80s/90s fusion dorks like Weckl and Gadd into the context of a discordant metalcore band-- basically, it's everything Cynic and Atheist set out to do, only I think Candiria pulled it off a lot better.

He never played anything flashy, with not a single blast beat to be found in their catalog and only a couple bars of double bass, but his groove was absolutely unequalled to this day, and his fills are godly in their simplicity and tastefulness. I particularly appreciate that Ken did all this with a 4-piece kit and single bass drum, proving that the size of your kit has nothing to do with the size of your presence as a musician.

He was also a really, nice, humble dude-- I remember some kids coming up to him after a show in Portland, and he smiled and said, "No offense, man, but you only think I'm good because you've never listened to Jack Dejohnette." I see his point, but I don't think Ken gave himself enough credit, he is a brilliant musician in his own right!

Forest Stedt - Cephalotripsy/Condemned

This one will probably be the hardest for most people to appreciate, but in many ways he's the most innovative of these drummers. What makes his playing so interesting to me is how cold, mechanical, and completely different from typical "rock" drumming it is. He almost never plays fills, changes tempo in ways that make no immediate sense, and almost plays the drums like a lead instrument. I love how he hits his snare so infrequently, instead using his cymbals to add subtle texture while keeping time with non-stop double bass. I think of it as the Stanier style applied to slam metal: every single note counts, with his playing stripped down to the absolute minimum possible.

Charlie King - Bloodlet

I always liked Helmet as a kid, but it wasn't until Charlie started repping them in interviews that I really started to appreciate them (he also got me into Carter Beauford). Stanier's influence on Charlie is obvious, but Bloodlet took it to another level, with an even crackier snare tone, even weirder time signatures and odder accents. I remember him telling me that they were tired of people dancing too hard at their shows, so their new song was in 13/16 to make it too difficult to dance to it-- genius!!

Again, Charlie's playing isn't flashy, but if you listen closely you'll appreciate how innovative subtle it is, with a rock-solid foundation underneath everything. Also, he was like 17 when they wrote all the songs on their early 7"s, which is kind of mind blowing considering that I could barely play Black Flag songs at that age. Anybody know what he's up to these days??

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These guys might seem boring to younger readers who are used to every 16 year-old being able to play ass-ripping double bass, but to me they are all brilliant musicians. The common thread is that they're all classically-trained band geeks who play in metal/hardcore bands, always with flawless technique, restraint, and most importantly always trying to make the song better (rather than just trying to make drum nerds jizz).

Honorable Mention

Will Shepler, Madball: Amazingly solid, brought the groove to hardcore that is de rigeur today
Ryan Murphy, Undertow/Everything Went Black/Ensign: Hard-hitting, super solid rock drummer in the vein of Chuck Biscuits and super nice guy
Kyle Burns, Forever The Sickest Kids: Very cool loose, dancey style that's perfect for their band
Nick Jett, Terror: Hardcore MACHINE!!
Todd Preboski, Champion/Betrayed: One of my favorite people on the planet, and taught me a ton about drums-- he taught me the subtle brilliance of Living Colour, too!

What newer drummers am I missing out on? I'm sure there are tons, but I don't really listen to much new metal/hardcore, and most of the other music I listen to doesn't really place a premium on musicianship (I mean, is the drummer for Cash Cash even an actual human being, or just a Cubase track?). Please no blast beat virtuosos, that stopped being interesting to me over a decade ago.

New Garbage Day [ft JJ Demon, The Audition and Big Chocolate]

As you may know, I have been contributing to Something Awful's "Garbage Day" feature once a month for a while now. The latest installment features a dreadful Christian nu-metal band called 1000 Foot Krutch, Big Chocolate, The Audition, and my personal favorite, a new scenebro called "JJ Demon."



Here's what Andrew (the brains behind Garbage Day) had to say about it:

Either somebody already told JJ Demon that he killed hip hop, and that insult served as the catalyst for this song, or he wrote it as a preliminary strike against the likely response. Really, though, what JJ Demon (that fucking name) does has nothing to do with hip hop. "It's not rapping, it's songwriting," his handlers clarify, a haughty position to take regarding someone best known for a song-length whine about someone sending his calls to voice mail. While the claim that "his flow and syllable placement are unmatched even by the most gifted rappers" is fucking ludicrous, JJ Demon is competent, in that his lines rhyme and they're on-beat. Lyrically, though, it's the usual blend of polysyllabic nonsense (Mesopotamia/audio/Saudi Arabian automatic) and embarrassing commentary (you love hustlin' so much/why don't you marry it?) paraded by most technically decent yet clearly just-not-fucking-getting-it white MCs. However, instead of the standard facial-hair-and-hooded-sweatshirt uniform, he looks like a slightly younger Weird Al. At least in this video. In his million MySpace pictures, he just resembles a typical scene clown.

Thanks as always to Andrew and the gang at SA for having me-- make sure you read Garbage Day every week!

READ MORE HERE

Say Hello To My Little Friend: Sum Moar Thugcrab

As we all know, white people love 3 things above all; pointless applications of technology, OTW chicks, and gangster imagery. From that wonderful Thugcrab video, putting knuckle-dusters on everything, and a shit ton of other videos and photo shoots where bands try to be down with the streets as oppose to painfully middle class, white kids never miss a chance to put guns and new era caps on everything.



Now, finally, one band combines all 3 of these things in a brilliant culmination of white envy, Upon a Burning Body, and this video for their song "Carlito's Way". Oh, did I mention that every single one of their songs is about an Al Pacino film #srsly. As far as white boy gangster stuff goes, I fail to see how any other young Summeriancore bands can top this devotion to being a painfully obvious wigger. Even Waking the Cadaver are impressed.



The video begins with with the band, some other altbros, and smart guys in suits all playing poker and smoking cigars.


In their interpretation of "setting the scene", this goes on for a while, with many many shots of cigars, cards, people pulling "poker faces", and the bassist's gormless face. I think they were really trying to hammer home the organised crime vibe. Oh yeah, and they also show off plenty of whiskey, which combined with the other factors, poker and cigars, leaves no doubt of gangsterism. Combining all these things counts as suspicious behaviour in most states. All they left out was trench coats.

Anyway, they play poker for awhile, accost one of the suit guys for cheating (didn't see that one coming), and then out of nowhere, BAM, OTW chick shows up and kills everyone!

When the only person left is the singer, she runs out of bullets and instead of reloading and killing him, or him shooting her, they instead play poker to see who lives. As instigated by this very smug face.

The UABB smug version of a poker face

Of course he goes on to win, and shoots her in the face, ending this exercise in "how much gangster stuff can we cram into one video".

Oh, and the song is pretty standard Summarian...

Why do white deathcore bands love gangster stuff? Why do all metal bands these days have ghey-ass long winded names like Upon a Burning Body? What signifyers of organised crime were left out? Who was the girl? Do you think mb she was some chick they were ppl trafficking and escaped to get revenge? Why do all bloggers now feel the need to end all posts on a series of questions a la HRO?

So Common So Cheap - "The Original Emo Webcomic!"

Don't ask how I found this. At first I thought it was only a page or so, and just a joke. Then I kept reading...mother of god...

I figure it's a pretty obvious albeit unconventional application of SYWH, combining Emo, Scene, and entry level anime drawing. It's by some bro calling himself Ziggy, or "ZiGGYxCORE" on deviant art.

Ziggy's impression of himself...

As you've probably figured out, it's an engaging, emotional, and humour filled webcom about various brands of alts, and their interactions and dealing with being woefully middle class, it's also 2 years old, so you can lol at all the slightly out of date overdone stereotypes with the wisdom of hindsight. from the blurb:

"SCSC is about an emo kid named Kyle who likes to blatantly state he is emo, with no shame in his game. It is also about his younger sister Korey and her life of violence and airheaded best friends while also trying to teach the ways of Hardcore, and about Daniel the hott punk neighbor next door with a heart of gold, who is also very confused?"

Not quite sure what the question mark at the end is about...is he confused? Isn't he? Is this some kina literary device? By "confused", does he mean "kina ghey"? Also, saying liking hardcore at 15 and occationally pitting is a "life of violence" may be a little bit of an exageration, but hey, gotta shift units right?!?

We find the writer pulls no punches with the comic, throwing us right into the action in the very first page, with our bi-curious protagonist proclaiming, "Hi, my name is Kyle, age 16, My hobbies are to make fun of ppl and to cut myself in the dark while listening to songs about heartbreak".

yup! They went there!

Kyle seems to be the amalgamation of what all right wing parents and mainstreamers thought emo kids were in like, 2006. Not sure if it's set then or not. Seems like a very Daily Mail kina view of the world, even though irony is also claimed.

His sister Korey seems pretty chill though, she's like, meant to be some kind of militant straight edge chick. She hates posers violently, which is subtly conveyed by having her shouting about Hot Topic or The Chariot whenever she's on, or threatening to put "brass knucks" in ppls faces when they claim to be edge.


Never really experienced edge before so I guess that's why she seems kina novel (in the same way I find wiggers novel, and Sargent D finds Chavs). I remember a few douchlord no fun club kids in local hardcore bands when I first started playing gigs, but they wern't really violent, they just claimed to be "edge" and purport to be better than me and my dumb underage friends just trying to get drunk and high.

There's a ton of other cardboard cutout alt characters too. Unfortunately, the modern day thick glasses hipster faggot didn't get a look in, I guess they "missed the party". Anyway, everyone for the most part sits around and talks at great lengths about "scenes", how silly they all are, and name drop bands all over the shop. Pretty much every other page has some kind of lengthy diatribe about how silly a particular sect of alt is.

Deep..........man

Tbh I found it pretty amusing at times, kina glad it seems to have a representative from each sect of alt more or less, instead of just being an emo kid circle jerk. Anyway, it's pretty much dead now, as ZiGGYxCORE himself has admitted on his own deviant art, ending mid story ark, and leaving a lot of very disappointed fans (srsly)

However, he does link to some other new "emo web comic" he's working on, which would appear to be him carrying the torch into the scene generation, called "Life Sucks".

Unfortunately this one is pretty much purely a "scene kid circle jerk", and so far has some 14 year old dude who may or may not be now in Attack Attack! complaining about what is apparently a sweet ass life. Think the guy decided to make it more explicit to show how awesome scene kids are. Seems kina ghey, like a scene webcomic version of Skins. At least SCSC was a little more insightful, kina critiquing-albeit rather clumsily-most alts, and at times genuinely quite funny. I think life sucks is just various annoying scene kids getting fucked up and complaining about life. Seems to be exactly what SCSC was making fun of :/. Fuck you Ziggy.

Still waiting for someone to catch on that all being teen and alt involves is just pitless sarcasm and snarkyness, enough to make even sex and drugs seem really dull and unspectacular.

Plz caption this picture [via white ppl on Segways

"I have had it with these motherfuckin' white ppl on these motherfuckin' Segways!"

I was at the park the other day with my AZN when I saw the scene above: a group of white ppl on Segways accompanied by a grumpy-looking African American man in a suit. I am not sure what was happening, but I thought I would turn to you, our readers, for ideas.

Who is the African American man and why is he wearing a suit in the park?? Why are white ppl fascinated by useless applications of technology? Do u have an AZN?

SNL introduces crunkcore to mnstrmrs

In the most significant development since NPR used SYWH as a source for their crunkcore article, television comedy show Saturday Night Live aired a humorous crunkcore song last night (via famous Jew/comedian Andy Samberg).

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What do u think this means for the genre?? Has it 'jumped the shart' or is it going 2 be more popular than ever? Will Breathe Carolina or BrokeNCYDE ever do cameos in a 'digital short' that becomes the next 'campus viral sensation'??

Some 90s jam 4 u

SKRAMZ! duhduhduh LET THE BOYS BE BOYS

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I stole that line from some dipshit on AIM

What are your favorite 90s songs that appealed to both skramz and mnstrmrs?? What is the best song on the Judgment Night soundtrack???

Bands u may have slept on: DFL

Hardcore wasn't always for rich, popular Christian kids in skinny jeans and scene hair. Long ago, in a galaxy far away, it was a more extreme form of punk rock. This is old news to anybody around my age, but I don't think kids these days fully grasp it because it was literally ten years before the kids in Attack Attack! or whatever were even born. I didn't get into hardcore until 1989, when it had been in full swing for many years and Youth of Today brought in hordes of jock moshers, but even then it was a very different beast than today.

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IFC host Henry Rollins' first band, State of Alert (aka SOA)

A land before flat irons
At that time, hardcore certainly wasn't for anybody who was remotely cool, popular, good-looking or otherwise healthy and happy to be alive. People like Scott Vogel understand this, which is why I like it so much when he says "We are not a rock and roll band. We are not cool. We are fucked up kids just like all of you." Hardcore was for fucked up kids, and at least to me, it meant bands like SOA, Minor Threat, Black Flag, MDC, DRI, Poison Idea, and believe it or not, the Beastie Boys. Many people don't know that they weren't always a gay, uptight "rap" group for socially-conscious college students who go on to be shitbag yuppies that drive Volvos-- they were actually one of the first hardcore bands, way back in 1981 or so.

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The first blast beat??

Not only that, but their song "Riot Fight" is the first example of a blast beat that I am aware of, predating NYC Mayhem, Infest, Napalm Death and all that Earache stuff by several years. So all you thrash dorks who worship Nine Shocks Terror or whatever should probably be jocking the Beasties for pioneering this shit. I really wish the Beasties would have stayed a hardcore band, because they were really good at it, and it was way cooler than when they lost my respect by taking back all the ignorant, misogynist, and homophobic stuff they said on "License to Ill."

Later on, they did a few hardcore songs on "Ill Communication" the "Aglio e Olio" EP (featuring Suicidal Tendencies' Amery Smith on drums), but basically moved away from it after "Pollywog Stew." And it's a shame, because they were a really fucking good hxc/thrash band.


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The 1994 Beasties song "Heart Attack Man" wouldn't have been out of place on the Minor Threat 7" or Circle Jerks LP

DFL = What if the Beasties kept playing thrash?
Enter DFL, or Dead Fucking Last. Originally featuring Adam Yauch on bass, DFL is basically what it would sound like if the Beasties hadn't turned into boring, gay rap for oversexed, middle class college kids. They released a 7" called "My Crazy Life," a CDEP version of the 7" and I think two LPs, but I think the 7" is their best material.



It basically sounds like a band that would have played with JFA, MDC, Adolescents, or any of the other 80s hardcore bands I grew up on. Like those bands, they played raw, fast hardcore, but never lost their sense of humor- I still laugh at the intro to one of the songs where he introduces the band as "Crazy Monty, Crazy Adam, Crazy Tom, and Fucked Up Tony."

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Tour footage and "Pizzaman" (he delivers)

I feel like all the dorks who got into the whole "thrash" thing in the 90s totally overlooked this band because they were on Epitaph, despite that DFL did 80s hardcore better than any of the crappy bands putting out one generic, shitty 7" after the next. Now that kids are into the whole Municipal Waste thing, maybe they'll finally get their due?

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Not their best song, but pretty OK

Either way, don't sleep on DFL if you missed them in the 90s! This 7" fucking rips, and I'm pretty sure this is long, long out of print (it was on Grand Royal), so I'm including a download link: Cop the DFL 7" here

Stuff You Will Hate appears on NPR; crunkcore legitimized by ex-Sleater Kinney member

In what might be the most surreal, irony-laden moment of my life, a recent NPR blog post mentioned Stuff You Will Hate as a source for information on crunkcore. As if it couldn't get any funnier, the writer of the post (Carrie Brownstein) used to be in fucking SLEATER KINNEY, who I saw many times growing up in the Seattle punk scene of the early 90s. If I had to make a list of people unlikely to have any interest at all in SYWH, she would be at the very top, so I'm stoked to count her as a reader!

Her former band

I am very grateful for the link, because I've gotten a lot of traffic from it, and most likely from people who would normally never read this site. Thanks babe! Even though I mostly listen to Hatebreed and Demolisher these days, I actually do like Sleater Kinney. And I'm not into indie chicks, but in Carrie's case I would- she's got a certain charm about her, maybe it's because I *am* into Jewish girls??

Read the NPR post here